Salvation
by earthtoleah
Summary: After being kidnapped from her Charming home at 13 and found 15 years later on the side of a road; Isla-Rose Lawson is not what the residents of Charming had expected to find. Safe from the horrors she has known, can she be saved from herself? Or the gang of bikers she finds herself living among? Contains some sexual abuse and other adult themes, loosely follows show.
1. Chapter 1

**So this is my first SOA fic, it wont be perfect but I hope you enjoy it never the less. I do not own Sons of Anarchy and do not claim to. Isla however is my own. Please read and review**

 ** _Chapter 1_**

 _'Please just let me die, I don't want to live anymore'_ she drifted in and out of consciousness; it was hot as Hades out on the roadside where she lay, wrapped in a dirty old dust sheet, unsure of how long she had been there. The only way she knew she what was reality was from the sharp pain that pierced her ribs every time she breathed, the dull ache that radiated the rest of her body and the fact her throat was about as dry as the dirt she was lying on; that was consciousness. Finally after hours maybe even days, she wasn't sure anymore, a light appeared in the distance gradually coming closer and she closed her eyes, a smile on her face believing all her prayers had been answered.

"Shit man, this is real bad" The blonde biker looked down at the battered and bruised body on the floor in front of him.

"What do we do man? Oswald's girl and now this?" The Scotsman frowned, his eyes never leaving the figure, his buddy bent down and looked at the body in front and then almost fell over in surprise when he noticed the rise and fall of the girl's chest.

"Holy shit! She's breathing we gotta get her to St Thomas!"

 ** _Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_**

She had never been religious, never really believed that once you die, you go to heaven. What she was pretty sure on was if Heaven did really exist, they probably wouldn't have much use for heart rate monitors. Slowly but surely the girl started to regain consciousness; she became more and more aware of her surroundings. The machines monitoring her, the nurses and doctors bustling in and out. The low hum of activity from the corridor beyond her secluded little room and the pain. The pain was the only real way she knew she was alive. It seemed never ending but she still couldn't open her eyes; they just felt too heavy so once again she gave in to the darkness and let the unconsciousness take over again

"No one knows who you are or where you came from, why do you look so familiar to me?" There was someone sat in the chair beside her bed and based on the smell of leather and stale cigarettes that was invading her nostrils, it wasn't one of the nurses "Who did this to you?" whoever he was, he sighed and touched her hand, the briefest of touches and yet it felt as though she had just been electrocuted, then he left and again she was alone

As more and more time passed, the girl became more aware of who were coming and going, the doctors and nurses; they all had that no nonsense thing about them, they came, they checked her charts and they left, yet she could never shake the feeling that someone was watching her.

Stuck in the hospital bed, unable to move her heavy limbs, the girl started to lose track of time. Hours turned into days and days turned into weeks. A constant cycle of being trapped in a hospital bed, unable to move and being trapped in her nightmares, forced to relive the past few years of her miserable existence over and over again.

After waking up from her latest terror, she suddenly became very very aware of someone else in the room with her. The fear took over then, it closed in around her making her heart beat faster, the monitors making that all too obvious. She felt as though her hands might be clammy, her throat felt like it was closing up. The fear threatening to break loose; and then it did, those icy blue eyes snapped open and she started to scream.

Gemma Teller-Morrow jumped back in shock, holding her hand to her heart as the stranger in front of her started to scream.

"Jesus Christ!" she gasped and was relieved at how short lived the screaming was as the nurses came in and sedated the girl again.

"Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" she leaned against the wall of the tiny little room. "How did you end up here?" she murmured more to herself than anyone. As her dark eyes searched the girls face they caught on to her ice blue coloured ones which sent a shiver down Gemma's spine, she'd seen those eyes before.

"Oh God Isla" Gemma sat down in one of the rickety old hospital chairs and started to weep for the blonde in the hospital bed before her.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Chapter 2_**

 ** _Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed so far, I really appreciate it. I've been struggling a bit with the start of this fic, got so many ideas its hard to get it all onto paper. I hope you enjoy this chapter, more will be revealed very soon._**

 ** _Warning; this chapter does contain bits readers may find disturbing. I do not own Sons of Anarchy and do not claim to_**

"Gem? Are you okay honey?" Gemma's best friend Luann Delaney put down the manuscript she held in her hand and hoped out of her director's chair as her friend came bursting through the doors.

"What's going on?" Gemma held up a newspaper clipping with a young girl on the front of it, a young girl with blonde curly hair, bright eyes and a wide smile.

"She's back Luann! It's her I'm sure of it!" Luann froze for a moment, her mouth forming a small round O of shock, and then she unfroze and took the paper from her friend

"Wh-Where? Take me to her, I gotta see her now."

SOASOASOASOA

Back at the hospital Jackson Teller stood outside the hospital room, looking in at the sedated girl. Every time he saw her he became even surer that he had met her before.

"Ma?" he looked up as the click of high heeled boots could be heard on the cold hospital floor "Luann? What are you guys doing here?" Gemma ignored her son and gestured to the girl with a small nod of her head. Luann looked into the room and gave a small sob before rushing inside leaving the two of them in the hallway.

Gemma held the newspaper clipping out to her son who took it, his eyes scanning quickly through the news story.

"Isla-Rose Larson?" he muttered "The girl that went missing when we were like thirteen?" He looked back up at Gemma with raised eyebrows and his mother just nodded, her eyes glued to the scene that was unfolding through the glass window. Luann was sat in the chair, holding the girls bruised hand in her own and crying quietly. Jax frowned, what was he missing here?

"But what is she to do with-?"

"Come on, we should go and see Abel" Gemma said nothing more and led her son away

SOASOASOASOA

"She's awake." Luann announced as she sunk into the chair beside Gemma's in the hospital waiting room, "Hale is trying to get something out of her but she just won't talk, I overheard the doctor talking to him." Luann raised her eyes to Gemma's and gulped.

"He said that—that..." She couldn't finish the sentence but she didn't have to, Gemma knew.

The girl had been sexually abused, and for a long time judging on what the nurses had said.

Gemma looked up as her husband walked through the hospital doors and into the waiting room.

"Gem, Can I have a minute?" Clay Morrow asked.

SOASOASOASOA

"Come on Jackie boy! Church is in ten!" Chibs called out to him as he parked his Dyna by the club house, yanking his helmet off and securing it to the handle bars.

When the last prospect left the room and the doors were closed Jax looked to his stepfather and club president.

"So the girl that Jax and Chibs found today has been identified as Isla-Rose Lawson." Every man sat at the table nodded solemnly. They had all heard about the state in which she had been found, Clay scratched his chin before continuing.

"She went missing about fifteen years ago," he explained for those members of the club who weren't present at the time. Bobby, Piney, Jax and Opie all nodded, they remembered the chaos all too well. Isla's mother, Emily Larson had been a quiet girl around town, she had run Charming's only coffee shop, single mom trying to make ends meet. The club had offered help on more than one occasion but she had always refused. When her only daughter went missing, the coffee house had been shut. Isla's picture had been taped to every tree and lamp post for weeks.

"Reckon this has something to do with Oswald's daughter too?" Tig Trager asked. It had been just under 24 hours since Elliott Oswald's thirteen year old daughter had been found in the woods, attacked and raped. Clay looked around the table grimly;

"I don't know, but this is only going to fuel Elliott's rage, we need to get to the bottom of this my brothers, before something else happens; or there will be hell to pay!"

SOASOASOASOA

Gemma's eyes snapped open as the sound of someone moaning reached her ears; she looked to her right to see Isla tossing in her sleep, a tortured expression haunting her pretty face. It broke her heart to see her in such a state. The curly haired blonde, with freckles and bright eyes was long gone and in her place this hollow shell of the bubbly girl she had once known.

"Oh baby, I'm so sorry" she took Isla's frail hand and rubbed circles trying to soothe the girl out of her nightmares. Isla's muttering was almost inaudible even in the quiet hospital room; Gemma could only pick out a few words;

"No...Not again...not her...clown"

It made no sense to Gemma and honestly she didn't want to know, she just hoped whoever had broken this girl got what they deserved. Finally after what seemed like hours, Isla calmed and Gemma took her leave.

Leaving the hospital Gemma noticed another blonde girl tucked up in bed, focusing very hard n a pink cell phone. Taking a quick look around Gemma snuck into the room.

SOASOASOASOA

"Had a little conversation with Tristan"

Karen Oswald's rage filled eyes widened the tiniest bit.

"What? Why would you be talking to my daughter?" Gemma sighed and stopped in front of the woman.

"Told her I knew about the secret, she seemed relieved" Karen shrugged a bit, she was ruffled and Gemma knew it.

"What the hell did you say to her?" Gemma frowned at the woman before her, which confirmed her suspicion.

"She remembers everything doesn't she? You don't want the trial, messy press; you just want to sweep it under the rug." It wasn't a question

"Don't you judge me!" Karen was indignant

"I'm not judging you" It was Gemma's turn to be indignant "You don't know me, and I got no idea what it's like to be you, but I know something about burying the truth" she paused "and it's a burden you never wanna put on a kid" Karen's eyes filled with tears "Tristan has to know that this really happened, make her hide it? Lie about it? It'll come back and shit on every relationship she ever has" Gemma couldn't help but think of Isla, stuck in the hospital room, alone with her nightmares "That rich happy life you worked so hard to give her, you can just kiss it goodbye"

"If they arrest this guy, everyone puts a face to the crime and then it becomes real and for the rest of her life in Charming, she's not going to be Tristan" Karen sniffed "She's going to be the girl who was raped at Fun Town.

"Sweetheart; in her head, shell always e the girl who was raped at fun town, only thing worse than everyone knowing is no one knowing!" Karen sobbed and nodded

It was one of the Carnival workers; the clown" She whimpered, her breaking all over again for her baby girl. Gemma felt as though she had been punched in the stomach.

"The clown?" she whispered in horror as the realisation hit her, she ran back into the hospital as fast as she could in her stilettos.

SOASOASOASOA

"Karen Oswald came clean, one of the carnie guys raped Tristan, fat guy, dressed like a clown"

"Jesus, does Hale know?" Jax looked to his mother with wide eyes. He felt the blood pumping through his veins with fury

"Not yet but I can't stop her from telling him"

"Shit. Thanks mom" he turned to leave.

"Jax!" Gemma grabbed her son's wrist and took a deep breath "I think it was the same guy who took Isla" she whispered and Jax snarled before turning to leave. He hadn't been able to get Isla out of his head the last couple of days. She wasn't Isla anymore, not really. He pulled out his prepay.

"Yeah Clay? We got him!"


	3. Chapter 3

**_I apologise for the long wait between updates, had a few things come up. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, I know it's not much. Please read and review, all your thoughts are appreciated! SOA is not my own but belongs to the legendary Kurt Sutter._**

 ** _Chapter 3_**

 _"Hey Isla where'd you go?" thirteen year old Jax could hear the girl laughing somewhere nearby; her laughter seemed to echo off the adventure equipment around him. As usual a group of them were playing manhunt in the park after school. "Over here!" She laughed again and Jax smirked and lunged around the closest tree_

 _"AHA!" there was no one there; Jax stood up straight and scratched his head._

 _"Isla? Where are you?" He looked around and froze. His eyes falling upon the scene unfolding before him. A short fat stranger was dragging Isla away; his dirty, greasy hand covering her mouth to muffle her screams but Jax could see the pure unveiled terror in those icy blue eyes of hers. Their eyes locked for a moment and He recognized that plea for help but he couldn't move, no matter how hard he tried Jax couldn't make his feet move. Eventually the grubby, little man disappeared from his view, taking Isla with him. Jax released the breath he hadn't realised he was holding until an ice cold hand gripped his shoulder like a vice. He span round and his breath hitched in his throat again when he saw the woman in front of his. She looked like an older version of the girl who had just been dragged away except her blonde hair looked dirty and matted. Her cheeks were no longer plump and freckled but hollow and drawn back, her skin seemed sallow now, her eyes looked too big for her face._

 _"Why didn't you stop him? Why did you let him take me?" She whimpered_

Jax woke up in a cold sweat. The darkness felt as though it was suffocating him. He wasn't there. He wasn't there when Isla went missing. He rubbed his face and wiped the sweat from his forehead repeating the little mantra over and over. He lay back in his dorm staring at the ceiling knowing sleep was no longer an option for him. Not whilst Isla was still in the hospital and that sick fuck was still out there. Eventually Jax got up and got dressed, he was sick of just laying there. Yanking on his kutte he headed out to his bike, not really paying any attention to where he was going until he was standing outside the window of a certain hospital room.

"Jax? What you doing here?" he spun round on his heel to see Luann walking towards him holding a steaming cup of the poor excuse for coffee the hospital served, he looked a little sheepish.

"I don't know to be honest, I couldn't sleep, guess I just ended up here" he shrugged then frowned a little "Why are you here Luann?" Isla had never really had anything to do with the club as far as Jax could remember so why was the queen of porn stood in front of him with coffee and red rimmed eyes.

Luann chewed on her lower lip for a moment, trying to think of how to answer. "Isla is my niece" she finally blurted out and sunk into the rickety chair in the hall. "Emily was my little sister" Jax raised his eyebrows, whatever he was expecting it wasn't that. Did the rest of the MC know?

"Only Gemma, Clay and Otto know" Luann answered his unspoken question. "Emily wanted nothing to know with the club, she knew exactly what was going on and wanted nothing to d with that" Luann smiled fondly at her sisters memory "Em wanted so much more for Isla, she had this perfect life all mapped out, like something out of a movie" she stared through the window. "I still went and had coffee with them both every week" she whispered and Jax noticed the tears pooling in her blue eyes which, now he thought about it, were only a shade or two darker than Isla's.

"Isla had everything planned out too" she all but sobbed "She wanted to work with kids, do something with herself you know? She really wanted to make a difference"

And now this.

Luann didn't have to say the words, they were both thinking them. The two spoke for a bit longer until Luann decided to go and sit beside Isla's bed again; being the only remaining family she had left, the woman felt as though it were her duty to keep an eye on Isla. Emily would have wanted that.

Jax headed to the other end of the hospital and sat down beside his newborn son, he picked up the book that had been left at Abel's side and started to read.

 _"Why didn't you stop him? Why did you let him take me?"_

Those eyes haunted Jax again as he slept at his son's bedside

SOASOASOASOA

"Jax? Baby it's time to go!" He opened his eyes and stared up at the blurry figure in front of him. It was late morning by the looks of things. Things being his mother who stood before him. Gemma picked up the discarded book from the floor and crossed her arms "C'mon, Clay's waiting for you"

By the time Jax climbed out of the chair, rubbed the sleep from his eyes and went in search of his stepfather. Clay Morrow found his way to Isla's private room. He looked through the glass at the girl asleep in the bed and felt the anger welling up inside him. Tristan Oswald was 16; this girl was 13 when she was snatched from her hometown. It made Clay's blood boil thinking about it. The squeak of boots on the shiny floor brought his attention to his step son striding down the corridor towards him.

"We've got a job to do" his face looked grim as they left the hospital, making a quick call to Elliott Oswald as they left, The president and his VP were met by the rest of the MC as they headed towards the outskirts of town where Fun Town was to finish this once and for all.

SOASOASOASOA

Finally the job was done. Jax sat on the roof of the club house; cigarette in hand, with a trusty bottle of jack beside him. He replayed the events of that day over and over. How could Elliott have even hesitated?

That just didn't make sense to Jax. He was glad Clay had finished the job. For Tristan and for Isla. And however many other girls that clown had gotten his filthy little hands on. He shivered at the thought; even though the job was done Jax still felt haunted by those blue eyes and he couldn't for the life of him understand why?

Drowning the last of his thoughts out with Whiskey and smoke, Jax climbed down from the rooftop and went in search of a crow eater to help completely snuffle out those niggling thoughts at the back of his mind.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Chapter 4_**

"Gemma! Gemma! She's being released! Isla's going to be released tomorrow afternoon!" Luann's feverish excitement made even Gemma crack a smile.

"That's great sweetheart, is she staying with you?" the smile faltered for just a second but long enough that it didn't go unnoticed

"Yes" Luann resolved "Yes she is, I'm all she's got left" she looked over her shoulder and into the private room. Isla was still asleep but the tubes were gone, she no longer looked so ghostly.

SOASOASOASOA

The first thing she became aware of was the smell, still that sterile, chemical smell with a hint of something else, something more familiar. The second thing she became aware of was the sound of voices just outside her door, someone who sounded familiar; like a distant memory. The third thing she became aware of was the other person breathing heavily next to her. Once again that all too familiar fear filled her chest, her throat tightened and her ice blue eyes snapped open before Isla let out a high pitched scream.

The police officer at her bedside just about jumped out of his skin as he was rudely awakened from his sneaky little nap. "Jesus—"

"You better get your sorry ass outta here!" the blonde porn queen stormed through the door, for such a short woman she sure towered in her six inch heels. The officer nodded and scurried off; no doubt one of Hale's little minions, though he didn't quite have the balls to stand up to the two woman glaring at him in the room.

Luann sat down on the edge of Isla's bed, trying to soothe the girl. Her screaming quickly subsided and the fear left her eyes as they widened.

"Lu-Luann?" the porn queen nodded, her own blue eyes murky with unshed tears

"Hello baby" she sobbed as the girl flung herself into her aunts outstretched arms as if she were still only 13.

SOASOASOASOA

It had been two weeks since Isla was released; Luann sat before her computer screens, her head in her hands. The sound coming from the screens started to become fuzzy and darkness behind her eyelids took over.

"Luann?!" she jumped up, almost knocking over her coffee in the process

"In here!" Gemma appeared in the door way, she gave Luann a once over and her slight smirk turned to concern.

"Sweetheart when was the last time you slept? You look dead on your feet?" Luann rubbed her eyes and gave a small smile.

"Things have been ... a little different to what I was expecting" Gemma cocked her head to one side waiting on an explanation.

"Isla isn't sleeping very well, she's having some real bad nightmares" Luann frowned "It's bad Gem, I went in last night, she was screaming, thrashing around. Looked like she gauged a chunk out her own arm" The porn queen let out an exaggerated sigh; she wasn't really sure where to go with this. Luann looked up to see Gemma staring intently at her with a small smirk on her face.

"Take a few nights off sweetheart, Isla can come and stay with me for a couple of days. Clay has been spending a lot of time at the clubhouse so it's just me" she raised her eyebrows as her friend opened her mouth to protest stopping her in her tracks.

"Bu—"Luann stopped after a moment's thought. "Thank you Gem" she smiled, not wanting to admit that a good night's sleep was very much welcome in her book. Luann loved her niece more than anything but she was struggling however that was not something she was about to admit to Gemma who she knew would happily go through many sleepless nights for her family.

Later that evening Gemma went back to give Isla a ride from Luann's place, Jax had offered to go and get her himself but after seeing how jumpy and nervous Isla was around Clay, Chibs and Tig earlier in the week Gemma decided it was best for her to do the job herself.

"So how are you finding it with Luann?" Isla's blue eyes focused round to her.

"Oh yeah, it's great; I mean Luann does everything she possibly can for me." She smiled at the thought of her aunt. Isla had never been happier to be home and safe but she knew her aunt felt a little awkward around her, didn't really know what to say. Gemma nodded; she could tell Luann was a little out of her depth. "How hungry are you?" Gemma asked as she unlocked the door and led Isla inside. "Soup okay?" Isla nodded and followed her lead.

"Make yourself at home" Gemma called out as she lit up a cigarette and started to bustle around the kitchen, pulling a saucepan out here and a ladle from there. Isla stopped in the living room, her rucksack dropping to her feet as she looked around. There were so many pictures everywhere, so many different faces; a few that she recognised from years ago. Pictures of happier times.

Isla smiled slightly at a picture of Gemma's son Jackson, and his best friend Opie. She remembered them from school just the way they looked in the photo, all satisfied smirks and floppy hairstyles. There were photos of other club members and Gemma's other son Thomas who Isla could just about remember. She stopped in front of the photos that stood on the mantel piece and bit her lip as one photo in particular caught her eye. Three women with their arms around each other, all of them pulling the silliest faces they could, they all looked so happy. Isla could feel her eyes welling up with unshed tears; she was so lost in staring at their faces she didn't notice Gemma come up behind her.

"You okay sweetheart?" the younger woman jumped a little,

"Oh, um... yeah, just got a little smoke in my eyes or something" She rubbed her eyes with the sleeve of her jumper, not quite meeting Gemma's eye.

"I didn't realise you were friends with my mom too" She whispered, her voice catching slightly as she spoke. Gemma leaned over and picked up the photo, smiling softly at it with affection she nodded. "Yeah. Me, your mom and Luann. We were best friends in high school" Isla nodded and scrubbed her eyes again. Luann had sat down with her not long after she got out the hospital and told her the truth.

About ten years after Isla had disappeared her mom had given up all hope of ever finding her daughter again. Her entire life had collapsed when her baby girl went missing, her business went to ruins and she didn't care at all. She blamed herself, believing that if only she had been a better mother and watched over Isla better, she would never have been taken. Eventually it had become too much for Emily and she'd taken her own life.

"Keep it baby" Gemma looked at Isla, who sniffed a little bit and nodded. The older woman pulled her into a hug and let her cry out her feelings. Te two of them sat together on the floor in front of the fire place. Isla sobbing quietly and Gemma stoking her blonde curls. She knew there was nothing to say that would soothe Isla, she had to just wait it out. Eventually the crying subsided and Gemma told Isla to go and get some sleep, the girl looked exhausted. The soup had long been forgotten and neither woman were particularly hungry anymore.

"Hey mom?" Jax called out as he kicked the kitchen door shut behind him.

"SHHH! Isla's asleep!" Gemma looked up from the newspaper she was reading and shook her head. Jax gave an apologetic grin and came to sit down beside her "Sorry I forgot she was staying." He took the spliff that Gemma had been puffing on and inhaled deeply.

"How's she doing anyway? Chibs said she seemed a little freaked out when she came by the shop with Luann the other day?"

Gemma sighed and took her spliff back. "Well yeah, I don't think she's exactly very trusting of you guys right now" she explained her voice dripping with sarcasm. It would take a while before Isla was able to trust a man again.

They both stopped dead as a scream pierced the silence. Before jumping up and rushing to the spare bedroom.

"Holy shit" Gemma gasped as she flung the door open. Isla was obviously in the middle of one of the nightmares Luann had warned them about but she really wasn't joking when she said that Isla had taken a chunk of her own arm. The skin on her forearm was bloody and bruised.

"Jax help me" Between the two of them they managed to pin Isla's arms back and prevent her from hurting herself any more, for such a small girl she was deceivingly strong.

 _She could hear him whistling as he came closer and closer to his trailer "Precious I'm back!" he called out and she felt sick to her stomach. He was in one of his strange moods again and they never ended well for her. The door was flung open and sunlight filled the trailer for a moment, the sound of people laughing could be heard somewhere outside and the smell of fresh air reached her nostrils. Then he slammed the door and she was once again surrounded by the smell of dirt and unwashed people. "Hello my precious play thing" The clown wore that evil smile that never truly reached his eyes. In fact his eyes seemed full of hatred and anger. She pulled nervously on the ropes that bound her wrists and tried to move away from the grubby hand that was snaking closer and closer to her face. He paused and pulled back for a split second before slapping her sharply "What have I told you about pulling away?!" He roared in her face. "After all this time you still never learn" Lifting his hand he struck her again and she was plunged back into total darkness._

"Isla! Sweetheart wake up!" Gemma almost yelled as she tried to shake the girl awake. "Isla?! It's okay, you're okay!" she let go of Isla as soon as she opened her eyes and pulled her closer into a hug, assessing the damage to Isla's arm as she cried into Gemma's shoulder.

SOASOASOASOA

Jax can you take this through to Isla?" Gemma handed her son a cup of chamomile tea before massaging her temples slightly. "Look I need to run down to TM, all the decent first aid stuff is down there and I really wanna get some antiseptic cream and a bandage on those scratches" Gemma huffed a little knowing there was no point in sending Jax as he'd just get dragged into the clubhouse and never come back.

"Hey Isla? Can I come in?" Jax knocked on her door before going into the bedroom and placing the mug down on her bedside table. He sighed and rubbed his forehead before sitting down in the chair across from her bed

"You okay Darlin?" he frowned as she stared up at him with wide eyes.

"Umm yeah I'm all good. Sorry" Jax couldn't help but laugh at her

"No need to apologise" After what she'd been through he wouldn't really expect anything less. Isla nodded and took the tea, sipping it slowly. Chamomile had always been her favourite she wondered briefly how Gemma knew. "My mom has just gone down to the shop she wanted to get a few things for your arm" Jax looked over at the deep scratches which seemed to have stopped bleeding. Isla bit her lip and tried to cover them with her hand; Jax smiled almost sadly and got up to leave.

"Umm, Jackson?" he couldn't help but smirk

"Call me Jax Darlin, only my mother calls me Jackson." He leaned against the door frame, his own blue eyes locking with her icy ones.

"Right. Sorry. Um... Would you mind staying for a bit?" Isla chewed anxiously on her lip. Although she didn't like to admit it, the darkness terrified her now. The last thing she wanted was to be left alone with it. Jax seemed surprised at her request, after the warning from Gemma he had thought the last thing she would want was to be left alone with another man.

"Yeah sure, I can stay for a bit" he took up his seat by the window again and looked out, trying not to stare at Isla. Only when her breathing had slowed right down did he look back, she was fast sleep, her blonde hair sprawled out on the pillow behind her like some sort of golden halo. Resting his head on his hand Jax couldn't help but stare at the girl. Although she was looking much better than she had when he had found her, Jax could still see the dark circles and the drawn back look about her however he couldn't deny it. She was still beautiful, in a strange, haunting way. He sighed turning back to his view out the window.

 _'No point going there Jackie boy, you do not wanna go there'_

 ** _A/N: Thank you for your continued support everyone, would especially like to thank Eowyn628, who's stories y'all should definitely check out! I wasn't sure how I wanted this chapter to go but I'm pretty happy with the outcome. Sorry it took me so long! Please read and review, I love hearing all your thoughts! Thanks again my lovelies x_**


	5. Author's note

_**Hello guys,**_

 _ **I'm so sorry I haven't updated this story in a few months, I've not long moved house and things have all been rather hectic however I'm hoping to get in a few more updates on a much more regular basis. On the bright side; taking a break from writing has given me plenty of time to think of quite a few different ideas. So what would you as readers like to see? I was thinking of possibly skipping ahead a few months and getting on with the story a little more or would you rather find out more first? I'd love to know what you as readers think on direction, I'm always open to thoughts and other ideas.**_

 _ **Hope y'all had a good Halloween!**_

 _ **xo**_


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 ** _Few different ideas in this chapter, again apologies for the long wait between updates. Read and review please! Your reviews spur me on!_**

It had been about 8 weeks since Isla had been released, and there was a definite improvement no matter how slow it was, it was there. Gemma watched from the kitchen as Isla painted a welcome home banner for her grandson.

In the last few weeks, Isla had spent more of her time around the club than with Luann. She loved her aunt and knew her feelings were returned but Luann struggled to split her time between running her business and seeing her niece and Isla didn't really feel like being on her own a lot of the time. So she spent her time with Gemma, helping with a little bit of admin work in TM and trying to spend some time studying. Although she liked working with Gemma in the office after a few weeks she had sat the older woman down and told her she wanted to get her GED, Isla knew it's what Emily would have wanted for her to have some kind of qualification, so she studied.

Gemma smiled as she watched Isla, completely lost in what she was doing humming to herself, she could see so much of Emily in her daughter, not just in the way she looked but her mannerisms even after everything that had happened. The rumble of a motorcycle passing outside snapped Gemma out of her reverie, her thoughts drifting to her son. Isla and Jax and spent a little more time together than Gemma had ever expected, but it seemed to be doing them both some good. Isla was more confident around the club and just men in general, she didn't flinch every time one of the guys shouted anymore and it didn't seem to be hurting Jax to have a girl around that wasn't some sweet butt that practically drooled over the sight of him. Isla was still staying over Gemma's and now and had even crashed on Jax' sofa once or twice, the nightmares were still happening but Gemma thought they might have been getting better.

"Isla, baby why don't you head back over TM?" Gemma called out as she finished drying up the few glasses on the side. "Grab us some lunch on your way over and I'll meet you there in about an hour once I finish a couple of bits round here" Since Wendy had been admitted Isla and Gemma had spent time getting Jax' house back to a home, and they were getting there considering its original state the house had scrubbed up pretty well.

"Sure thing Gem, see you in a few!" she jumped up and grabbed the small leather backpack she usually carried with her and waved goodbye as she stepped out onto the sunlit street. The shop wasn't far from the house and it was a nice walk in the Californian sunshine. Isla could never get enough sun, she loved being outside. Jax had taught her to drive a few weeks back and Luann had even offered to buy her a car but for now she was happy to walk.

Isla picked up a couple of burgers and a few extra fries knowing all too well that whoever was working at the lot would probably try and snaffle some of her food anyway, she waved to a couple of the guys as she walked through the parking lot and stomped into the office to find one of the prospects attempting to file the volcano of paperwork that was scattered around the desk.

"You better not let Gemma catch you in here" Isla couldn't help but smirk a little as the prospect jumped and dropped the records he was holding.

"Jesus H Christ Isla!" he sighed and looked around "I'm going I'm going!" he muttered as she shooed him out and started putting things back in their places. Organised chaos was something she and Gemma could work with.

When the queen herself walked back in, Isla was sat in her chair burger in one hand and files in the other and Gemma couldn't help but laugh at her.

"Good burger baby?" she grinned and picked at a few fries before pulling a list out of her handbag. "Got a few more things that we need to pick up before Abel gets home, would you mind taking Jax to the store later, I think he'll wanna get some beers as well" Gemma smiled and threw a few bills to Isla who stuffed them in the pocket of her skinny jeans and grabbed her list on the way out before pausing to say something to Gemma who just smirked.

"Take mine" she offered and held up the keys to her Cadillac "But if you total it, I'll bust ya!" she grinned as Isla squealed and darted out the door and headed towards the club house. She flung the door open to be greeted by a couple of crow eaters, their filthy glares and a thick haze of cigarette smoke.

"Jackson?" she yelled marching past the bar, she rounded a corner and walked straight into the chest of a particular biker she was looking for.

"Hey Darlin' "he smirked down at the blonde girl in front of him "what's up?"

"Come on loser we're going shopping" Isla couldn't help the delight she felt at the brief flash of horror on his face. "Your mom needs some more stuff for the party" he visibly relaxed as she clarified and nodded.

"Whatcha waiting for then?"

SOASOASOASOA

"Jax we need to get some actual food as well! Beer ain't the only thing on this damn list!" she muttered as yet another crate was stacked into the cart "And juice!" she called after him as Jax walked away with a smirk on his face. An exasperated sigh left Isla's lips before she turned the cart around, marking things off as she wondered the shop.

It took her the best part of twenty minutes to pick up the rest of the stuff on Gemma's list before she sighed and realised Jax still hadn't come back juice boxes. When she finally found him he was talking to a crow eater that Isla recognized from around the club house that was fluttering her eyelashes in what she probably thought was a seductive manner.

"In a grocery store? Really?" She pushed the heavy cart over and smiled at Jax.

"You ready? I'm gunna need a hand with this lot" The crow eater shot Isla a look that bought the phrase 'if looks could kill' to mind.

"You guys having a party or something?" she asked hopefully turning back to Jax who just nodded.

"Yeah, family only" he smirked and slung his arm round Isla's shoulder and totally ignoring the incoherent mumbling coming from the crow eater "Come on then Darlin' lets head out"

Isla smiled and shrugged him off. "I'm a getting I'm a getting"

SOASOASOASOA

"I think we're about done here!" Isla called out as she finally hung the last banner over the sofa, she turned to climb down from the sofa to find Jax watching her with a curious look on his face.

"It looks real good Darlin' "he said honestly looking around the living room. He barely recognized the house anymore; it was clean, fresh and looked nothing like the shit tip he remembered.

"Ma's gone for takeout. Chinese" he told her whilst grabbing a couple of beers from the fridge and offering one to her. Isla took it with a small smile and cracked the cap off. "Listen I wanted to ask you about somethin' "Jax ran a hand through his hair and went lit up a cigarette. "Abel is being released around 5.30 tomorrow" Isla just nodded and took a sip of her beer wondering where he was going with this. "Ma is gunna come with me to pick him up, but I was wonderin' ... Would you come to?" Almost choking on her beer she looked up surprised. Was Jax serious?

"Why?" he could see the surprise in her wide forget-me-not blue eyes and Jax didn't really know what to say to her

"Well you've been around this whole time and everything you've helped my mom with, I just figured." He shrugged and wondered briefly if she would say no.

"Sure I will, I mean I'd be honored!" Jax grinned feeling relieved and nodded, pulling Isla into a quick hug. She stiffened momentarily and then relaxed.

"I really do mean it, I'm grateful to you for helping my mom with all this" he looked around then back to Isla who just nodded, she was slightly worried that if she said something her voice might crack and she might tear up. Something about Abel gave her a little more faith in the world, maybe it was his pure innocence. Either way whatever it was, that baby made her want to help Jax and Gemma, if it was only thing she could do to thank them for sorting her out in her own time of need.

By the time Gemma came back Jax was sat on the sofa with Isla asleep beside him, her head resting on his shoulder. The biker queen paused in the door way and smiled, she couldn't help but think what a pretty sight they both made.

"Sorry I took so long baby, had a few things to do but I bought food" she held up the take out cartons and they both froze when Isla stirred and opened her eyes.

"Did I hear something about food?" she rubbed the sleep from her eyes and sat up only for Jax and Gemma to crack up laughing.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"No...Stop it! Please!..NO!" The door burst open and Jax jumped on the bed pinning Isla's arms down by her sides so she couldn't hurt herself.

"Isla?! Wake up!" he shook her a little to try and pull her out of her nightmare "Come on! Holy Shit!" he hadn't noticed she'd managed to get one of her hands free until she smacked him square in the jaw.

"J-Jax?" Isla whimpered, massaging his jaw he sighed, knowing it was going to bruise.

"Yeah Darlin' it's me!" He held onto her as she sobbed against his chest "It was all so real Jax, it was so real!" Jax just stroked her hair and murmured soothingly to her. He'd seen a lot in his time with the club but sometimes the thing he heard from Isla's nightmares made even him feel sick to his stomach. Jax sat back against the headboard and held onto her until the sobbing subsided to hiccups and the odd sniffle, he was so lost in thought about Abel's homecoming it took him a while to notice that the hiccups had stopped and turned to light breathing. Isla was once again, out for the count. Ever so slowly, Jax tried to wiggle his arm free and then froze when Isla stirred again. Deciding it was too risky he settled down and just pulled Isla in a little closer, the smell of vanilla and macadamia filled his nostrils and although he would never admit it, he just could not get enough of that smell.

 _She's still a no go Jackie boy_

SOASOASOASOA

Isla walked through the hospital, with Jax leading the way, being back in the hospital and knowing it may possibly be the last time she would be there for a while made her feel a little giddy. As they rounded a corner Isla spotted a brunette doctor waiting by the entrance to the nursery. She looked familiar to Isla but she couldn't quite place her where from?

"Hey Tara" Jax nodded in acknowledgement. That's where Isla knew her from. Tara Knowles, the girl was in the same year at school as Jax, apparently they had dated after Isla had gone. This was the girl that Gemma had such hatred against, who'd broken Jax' heart once and Isla couldn't help but regard her with disdain, she smiled politely and started through the window as Jax signed some paper work "for liability" Tara had told him. Once he was done he handed over the clipboard without a second glance and turned away from Tara.

"You ready Darlin'?" he asked looking back to Isla with a childlike delight on his face; it was infectious and made her grin back at him.

"Are you ready?" Jax just smirked and looked over at the crib, his own smile widening at the sight of the baby boy wrapped in blankets, waving his arms about gurgling happily up at them. Without a second thought Jax reached over and lifted his son to his chest.

"You're coming home with us today son" he smiled.

Whilst Jax took Abel's bag down to the car and made sure that his car seat was correctly installed, Tig's handy work was always questionable, Isla sat in the rocking chair in Abel's room lulling him to sleep. Holding such precious cargo in her arms made her feel a little nervous but she knew she should get her chance in now because as soon as this little one was home, everybody in Charming would want their turn.

"You look much better since the last time I saw you" An almost bitter voice came from the door way, making Isla look up in surprise

"Excuse me?" Isla couldn't help but feel indignant as she looked into Tara's narrowed eyes.

"You clean now then?" Tara ignored her question and then it hit Isla

"I'm not Wendy, I'm Isla" Seeing Jax coming back through the doors at the end of the corridor Isla pushed herself out of the chair, keeping a strong grip on Abel, she shifted him gently and strode past Tara who at least had the good grace to look a little sheepish.

"You and the little man ready to go now Darlin'?" Isla nodded and glanced at Tara who was watching with an almost wistful look on her face as she watched the two of them take Abel home to his new family.

SOASOASOASOA

"Wheeeeeeyyyy!" the moment Isla and Jax walked through the door the room erupted in cheers, it seemed as though the entire club had showed up. There was Donna and Ope with Ellie and Kenny, Piney and Mary were even sat on the same sofa together which surprised Isla; everyone knew those two couldn't stand to be within a mile of each other. Clay and Gemma were there along with Tig, Chibs, Juice, the prospect and Happy had come back for the party too. It seemed as though the entire club had put in an appearance for the latest addition to the Teller family.

"Hey baby, how you doing?" Luann gave her niece a swift kiss on the cheek and handed her a drink.

From a distance Gemma watched as the two women chatted and smiled to herself. Isla had come such a long way and it made her proud, she turned her attention to her son and grandson who were still standing in the middle of the room surrounded by the club and getting all their attention. It hadn't slipped her notice that Wendy hadn't showed up for her own son's homecoming although she couldn't say that surprised her. The last time anyone had seen Wendy was just after Abel was born and she claimed she was going to check herself into sober living, like Gemma had really believed that, so she'd rang the rehab just to check and when she found out that Wendy had never shown up on her check in date so she finalised; That junkie whore had no business trying to be a mom to this little boy and if she ever decided to show her face again, Gemma would make sure she had a very clear understanding of that.

The rest of the evening went well in Gemma's opinion. Everyone seemed to be having a good time, chatting and enjoying their beers and despite the amount of noise in her son's little house Abel seemed to be taking it well, didn't cry once as he was passed from person to person and showered with cuddles and kisses. Eventually Donna, Opie and the kids said their goodbyes and made their way home, Tig and a few others soon followed out but when Gemma spotted Clay coming in with a worried look etched on his face she started to feel uneasy.

"Hey baby is everything okay?" she asked him, rubbing his back but Clay just shrugged her off and nodded and Gemma knew better than to push him.

Eventually everyone cleared out until there was only Isla sat on one sofa cooing over Abel who was laughing up at her, Jax sat beside her watching the two of them with a smirk on his face. Gemma and Clay sat on the other sofa with Bobby, Chibs and Juice leaning against various pieces of furniture whilst a couple of sweet butts cleared up a little in the background before making their own speedy getaway.

"That boy seems to have a thing for you already lass!" Chibs noted cheerfully, Isla looked up from Abel to see everyone in the room staring at her, she shrugged and smiled

"Maybe he's got a thing for blondes" Jax snickered and tugged at one of her bouncy blonde curls which only resulted in her smacking his chest and everyone laughing as Jax feigned injury. When Clay's prepay rang it seemed as though the whole room froze.

"Yeah?... oh boy" he sighed and rubbed his face "Thanks chief, I appreciate the heads up" he put the phone back in his pocket and looked up at the room of expecting faces. There's been a drive by downtown" he started, and straight away the room was abuzz with talk. "It was one of our own this time" Clay stated which caused everyone to stop dead "Donna was hit"

Isla suddenly felt very cold, as if all the heat had been sucked from the room. She and Donna had gotten on pretty well, they'd spent a few afternoons together and Isla had watched the kids a couple of times when Opie had to deal with club business and Donna had to work or run errands.

"You go I'll stay here with Isla and Abel" She could hear Gemma saying somewhere in the distance. Isla looked down at the baby lying in her lap who was staring up at her with wide blue eyes and thought of Ellie and Kenny.

"Yeah go," she muttered to Jax who was looking at her with a strange expression on his face, but he nodded and gave her a quick hug before leaving with the guys. Isla had pushed herself up, walked through to Abel's room and was settling him down in his crib before she even fully realised what she was doing.

"Sweet dreams baby" she whispered and turned his mobile on and grabbing the baby monitor before leaving the room, letting the door click quietly behind her, it was only when Isla rubbed her cheek that she realised she was crying and then suddenly she could stop it, she sunk to the floor, leaning against the wall as silent sobs wracked her chest. She wrapped her arms around her own slender frame and tried to come to terms with the fact a woman she had seen only an hour before, one of her friends, had been snatched out of her life forever.

"Oh Isla baby" Gemma found her there after about twenty minutes; she helped Isla up from the floor and back through to a seat on the sofa. From personal experience Gemma knew there was nothing she could say that would make Isla feel better, especially for a girl that had already lost so much so she just held her close and rocked her gently as if she were still a small child and she stayed that way until the sobbing subsided and Isla started to doze. "Baby why don't you go to bed? The guys won't be back tonight, I'll stay and keep an ear out for Abel" Isla sat up straight and rubbed her eyes before looking at Gemma and sighing.

"Its okay, why don't you go home too Gem?" she smiled at Gemma's slight look of concern "Honestly, I'll be fine. I can look after Abel" she whispered and waved her trusty baby monitor in the air.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" Gemma couldn't shake her worry but Isla nodded

"Yeah, honestly I feel pretty numb right now, I'll be just fine" Gemma could understand that, so she just nodded and kissed Isla goodbye before grabbing her handbag and heading out to her own car. Isla stood up and stretched out, deciding Gemma was right and there was no point in wallowing besides tonight Abel needed her and tomorrow, someone else would need her so she checked all the locks and tiptoed through to Abel's bedroom and set out a couple of cushions and a blanket that was hanging over the back of the sofa he had in his room, she peeked in at him and smiled seeing him sleeping soundly, his tiny little fist wrapped up in the blanket she had bought for him a couple of weeks earlier. Isla settled herself down and tried to sleep as well letting Abel's soft breathing lull her into an uneasy sleep.

SOASOASOASOA

As Jax walked up his front path he could shift the sorrow that sat firmly on his shoulders for his closest friend and his family. Opie was totally inconsolable and it broke Jax' heart to see his friend's anguish. With a heavy heart he climbed the steps to his front door and turned the key in the lock trying to be as quite as possible, stepping inside he pushed the door to and closed it then paused to see if he could hear anyone about inside the house but only the silence greeted him. The living room showed no evidence of a party the night before and Jax sighed knowing Gemma would have probably cleaned up the moment they had all left. He crept through to his bedroom and was surprised to find it empty; who was looking after Abel?

He turned and paused in front of the door to his son's bedroom, his thoughts still lingering around Opie's two kids before he pushed the door open and stepped inside. After everything the night before had brought him, he couldn't help but smile at the scene in front of him. Abel was still sound asleep in his crib, his little legs caught up in the sheets whilst Isla slept on the sofa, with a blanket pulled tightly around her. An 'Isla burrito' she had told him when Jax had once commented on how tightly she wound them around herself. The thought made him smile and as he leant back against the door frame a small part of him wished he could come home to this every day.

 ** _A/N: You may get a few more chapters sooner rather than later because I'm feeling like a girl on a mission although I did struggle with this chapter a bit as Donna's death makes me so sad and I wasn't particularly looking forward to writing it. Please read, review and feel free to throw a few more ideas at me! Thank you to everyone who's stuck with me so far xo_**


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"SURPRISE!" Isla shrieked and almost dropped the beers she was carrying as Luann, Clay, Chibs, Juice, Tig, Piney, Happy and Jax all jumped out on her, all party poppers and wicked smiles.

"Happy Birthday baby" Gemma laughed from behind her, Abel in her arms, as everyone came up to give Isla a hug and kisses on her cheek. Her birthday wasn't something she had given a lot, if any, thought to but Gemma had decided both the club and Isla needed something to celebrate. She seemed to be taking Donna's death a lot better than anyone had ever expected but Gemma wasn't stupid, she could see how the smile didn't quite reach Isla's eyes anymore but they seemed to be getting a bit more of their sparkle back.

"You didn't tell me it was your birthday Darlin'?" Jax slung an arm round her shoulder and raised an eyebrow, Isla flashed her own lazy little smile and shrugged

"Honestly, I forgot. Haven't really celebrated a birthday for a while ya know" Jax' lips tightened for a split second and then he just nodded, he got that. Everyone sat down at the table and Isla was shocked when Gemma bought a large carrier bag through with presents and a card for her. Isla peeked inside the bag and bit her lip, she could feel her throat tightening at the kindness the club had showed her and she thought for a moment she might cry.

"You didn't have to do this, any of you" She mumbled, a little embarrassed as she looked up at all the faces sat round the table.

"Oh honey!" Luann laughed at her niece and gave her a little squeeze

"You're family baby, this is what we do for family" Gemma told her and Isla nodded. It was true, the club was her family now, it was a little dysfunctional but it was a family none the less. She opened her card and scanned through the different messages from everyone, some of them were so rude she laughed until she felt tears running down her face.

"Thank you!" she attempted the presents next, which mostly consisted of different liquors from the club, a beautiful little charm bracelet from Luann which turned out to have belonged to her mother and was one of a twin set. The other was fastened firmly around Luann's own wrist although she had plenty more charms on her own than Isla had she didn't mind. A bottle of what she believed was very expensive perfume from Gemma and Clay and a tiny little keychain marked from Jax with a burrito hanging on it. She laughed and looked up at him, meeting his blue eyes with her own sparkling ones.

"Thank you Jackson" she snickered, he just smirked back at her.

"Hey lass, we decided we'd throw a party at the club house tonight in your honour, think you'll be able to fit us into your busy schedule" He gestured to Abel and Isla smiled, she'd been spending a lot of time with Abel, it gave her something to take her mind off everything else and Isla figured there was no point in paying Neeta when she was perfectly capable of looking after the baby.

"I think she can manage" Gemma assured them and handed Abel over to Isla, who knew better than to argue, before she went and started to dish up the roasted meat and vegetables she had prepared for everyone to enjoy.

"Isla? Jax is waiting, why are you still here?" Gemma leant against the door frame and watched as the girl fiddled absently with her grandson's blanket, tucking it absently around him and then spun round.

"I'm heading out now, I just..." she looked back at the sleeping baby "Wanted to say goodbye" Gemma looked at Isla for a long moment and smiled.

"You'll make a great mother one day baby" she smiled and shooed Isla out the door.

SOASOASOASOA

"What took ya so long Darlin'?" Jax stood out the front of Gemma's house leaning against his Dyna with a cigarette dangling from him lips, he held out a spare helmet Isla before throwing away his butt. Without waiting for her answer he pulled on his own helmet and swung his leg over his bike. "Let's go" Isla bit her lip and pulled her own helmet on. She'd ridden bitch before and every time her stomach twisted up into a knot of excitement. Swinging her own denim clad leg over the back of the Dyna, Isla wound her arms round Jax' waist and breathed in, the smell of leather and cigarettes with a slight hint of peppermint filled her nostrils and she couldn't help but smile to herself.

Jax paused feeling Isla's slender little arms slip around his waist and looked down at them, her long perfectly polished ocean blue nails grasping firmly onto him and he discovered a strange feeling set over him; a strange ache. Shrugging it off, Jax kicked the Dyna to life and drove off into the darkness. Behind him, Isla tightened her drip, the wind rushing past her made her giddy with excitement, her eyes started to water with the need to blink as she tried to focus on the roads flashing past them.

By the time the pair of them reached the clubhouse, the party was already in full swing, music blaring, a fire burning in an old oil drum with various members of the club milling around, scouting the crow eaters for their piece for the night.

"You okay Darlin'?" Jax frowned as Isla rubbed her eyes and she smiled up at him, handing over her helmet with a nod.

"Wind just makes my eyes water a little" she mumbled. Jax laughed softly and pulled her into a hug pressing his lips to her forehead, feeling Isla tense up in his arms he loosened his grip.

"You'll get used to it" he took her hand and led her inside. Upon an entering a loud roar echoed throughout as people cheered. Tig, already drunk, came up and pressed a sloppy kiss to Isla's cheek.

"Happy birthday you gorgeous girl!" he laughed merrily as a crow eater wondered up and led him away. Isla just laughed and looked around. It seemed a little overwhelming; knowing all of this was for her, although any excuse for a party was good enough for SAMCRO. The sweet butt behind the bar offered her a beer and Isla took it gladly, making friendly conversation as all the hustle and bustle died down.

As the night drew in and drink upon drink was handed to her, Isla knew this euphoric dizziness was just the buzz of alcohol humming through her veins. She sat on a bar stool with the Scotsman beside her watching Jax Teller as he weaved his way through the club.

"You got a thing for Jackie boy lass?" a deep blush crept across Isla's cheeks and she prayed it wasn't as obvious as it felt although when she looked at Chibs, she knew he had noticed from the satisfied smirk on his face.

"Um...well I guess" she muttered not realising until those words came from her mouth just how true they actually were. In the last few months Jax had helped her leave the timid, frightened ghost girl behind and given the old carefree, bubbly Isla life and she had no words for just how thankful she was but her feelings went deeper than that. Something about him drew her in and no matter how much time she spent with the blonde biker she could never get enough. He was far more intoxicating than any alcohol she'd ever tried. With a spike of adrenaline Isla got up, deciding she wanted some more of that high only to stop dead when she spotted Jax being led down the corridor to his dorm by someone else. A blonde croweater she'd seen hanging around the club on a regular basis. It felt as though all the air had been ripped from her lungs.

 _'Of course. Why on earth would Jax Teller be interested in you? You're a skinny little no body with nothing to offer.'_

Her subconscious was screaming at her. So wrapped up in her own thoughts, Isla barely noticed as her legs gave out beneath her and a set of strong arms caught her before she could hit the floor and cause some real damage.

"Wow lass, I think you've had enough of that." The beer bottle was snatched from her hand and set on the bar before of hazel brown eyes studied her face.

"Bed time missy" Chibs sighed looked around; there wasn't a single sober person in sight that the Scot could trust to get Isla safely home so he led the drunken girl through the club house to his own dorm, helping her take off her shoes and her jacket, Chibs put Isla to bed and pulled the covers up around her only wishing he could still do this for his own daughter Kerri-Ann.

"Good night sweet girl" he smiled down at her. Isla mumbled something incoherent but her eyes were shut before her head even touched the pillow, she'd be out for the count and he knew it. Shutting the door quietly on his way out Chibs went back and joined the party. No one would disturb her until the morning and he was quite happy to sleep on one of the sofas or just wherever he passed out really, wouldn't be anything new. Without a second thought Chibs went back to the front room and grabbed the nearest drink to him.

SOASOASOASOA

As Jax started to come round he smiled to himself only vaguely aware of someone laying on the bed beside him though his smile soon faded when he realised how heavily that person was breathing and the smell, cigarettes and stale booze? He sat up and frowned down at the dirty blonde mess. It wasn't her.

"Get out" he pushed the crow eater of his bed, barely aware of her protests and pulled the blanket back up over his head. B the time she'd finally left Jax sighed knowing that he wasn't going to be getting more sleep, he felt far too awake now; so giving in, he got up and pulled on a pair of jeans and a SAMCRO tee deciding coffee might make him feel more alive.

Locking his bedroom door behind him, Jax turned to the direction of the kitchen, just as the door to Chibs' room opened and Isla stepped out, shrugging her jacket on and fixing her ruffled ponytail.

"Isla?" She turned and looked at her in shock as if he'd shouted at her, maybe he had? Suddenly feeling as though the alcohol from the night before might be putting in another appearance, Jax turned and ran back into his own bathroom slamming the door behind him. After puking his guts up the biker sat back against the cold bathroom wall.

Isla and Chibs? He'd never seen it coming. The girl he'd dreamt about, that he'd come home to find sleeping beside his son on so many occasions, was sleeping with the Scot? The dull ache in his chest was getting worse with every passing moment, the sickness in his stomach never passing and something told him it wasn't from the alcohol.

 _ **I'm sorry if this chapter seems a little rushed, I'm going to visit someone for a while so it may be a couple of weeks before I post another chapter. Just wanted to get atleast one more chapter out before I went.**_

 _ **As usual, please read and review. Your kind words spur me ever forward xo**_


	9. Chapter 8

**_Chapter 8_**

"What do you need kid?" Jax held his wailing son in his arms trying to figure out what he needed, he'd been fed, burped, changed, bathed changed again and his mobile had been playing lullabies for almost two and a half hours and Jax was at his wits end.

It had been two weeks since Isla's birthday and they'd hardly spoken since, Jax just didn't know what to say to her, the thought of her and Chibs together made him feel sick but he couldn't deny he missed her. There had been a few nights over the last few weeks when Abel had cried so much, all Jax wanted to do was call Isla and see if she could help him. Abel never seemed to cry for her where as whenever Jax would call Gemma, she would just ask him a million questions. Or last week when Juice had been telling Jax jokes about a Burrito and Jax found it so funny he had been half way through texting it to Isla before he remembered they hadn't spoken to each other in almost a week and a half.

After another hour of trying to comfort Abel, Jax gave up and went searching for his phone completely oblivious to the fact it was almost 2am.

SOASOASOASOA

Isla had spent her entire day running errands, cramming revision for upcoming exams, she'd been for a run and even cleaned Gemma's entire house even though the older woman had explicitly told her not to so she figured she should sleep pretty well that night, so after a hot bath and a mug of camomile tea; Isla had settled herself down and after a few hours of tossing and turning she did fall into an uneasy sleep only to be woken from a nightmare an hour later.

Since her birthday Isla had barely slept and when she did, the nightmares invaded. Sitting up the girl wiped the cold sweat from her forehead and looked up at the ceiling. This was ridiculous what was it going to take before she would get a good night sleep. Turning over and trying to find a cooler part of her bed, Isla couldn't help but miss the good night's sleep she'd had curled up on the sofa in Abel's nursery and falling asleep in Jax' bed, huffing she rolled over again trying to banish the thoughts from her mind.

When her phone started to ring, Isla welcomed the distraction having decided she probably wasn't going to sleep anymore.

"Jax?! What's wrong?" She asked not letting the phone ring for a third time.

"Oh Isla, thank god!"

SOASOASOASOA

When Jax flung open his front door, he could honestly say he'd never been happier to see Isla.

"I just don't know why he won't stop crying! I've literally tried everything and I don't really know what else to do!" Jax ran a hand through his messy blonde hair and looked into the forget-me-not blue eyes he'd been thinking of so much recently.

"Okay, well let's go see what's up with the little man!"

There was a small part of Isla that almost felt a little bit annoyed with Jax; who did he think he was? Totally ignoring her for two weeks and acting as if she didn't exist but then the second he had no one to help him he would call her up in the early hours of the morning and she would go running on over to his house like the stupid girl she was! But then the other part of her had just missed Jax and Abel so much and although she knew it was wrong Isla felt more at home in this house than she did at Gemma's.

"Oh baby boy! Whatever is the matter?!" Isla cooed over Abel as she scooped him up out of his crib and held him to her chest. "Come on little man, why are you keeping daddy up so late huh?" she murmured, rocking him to and fro.

Jax stood in the door way, resting his forehead against the door frame although he loved his son more than anything he felt as though if the wailing continued he may actually go insane. Suddenly the screaming subsided to whimpering and then to a little gurgle before all that could be heard was Isla's soothing voice. Jax looked up his eyes wide with shock.

"Isla? How the hell did you do that?" he whispered not wanting to set his little boy off again "Seriously, he's been crying for the last three hours and nothing I did helped" Jax was so frustrated, did his own son not like him?

Isla looked up at Jax and shrugged.

"You're welcome" she smiled at him and then smirked at the strange look on his face. "Don't sweat it papa bear! Baby bear is just having a bad night" she shrugged knowing Jax would be questioning what he could have possibly done wrong. He stared at her for a long moment before shaking his head and rubbing his eyes.

"Yeah well...I need coffee. Want some?" Isla smiled and shook her head. She rocked the baby boy for a few minutes longer before leaning forward and setting him back down in his crib only for him to start wailing again.

"Oh okay, looks like you're not going down tonight huh?" She murmured and was relieved the crying stopped as soon as she scooped Abel back up in her arms. When Jax didn't come back, Isla decided to go and look for him. She couldn't help but smirk finding him passed out on the sofa, the coffee down on the floor, cold and long forgotten. Carefully adjusting so she could hold Abel with one arm, Isla leant over and slipped the TV remote from Jax' grasp. She sat down next to him and let baby Abel sprawl out across her chest, his tiny little fist grabbing hold of a loose curl. The last thing Isla remembered before falling asleep was the feel of Abel's soft breathing against her neck, the warmth radiating from Jax who was totally out of it beside her and the soft humming on the TV in the background.

Jax woke up suddenly when his front door bell started to ring like crazy and jumped up to answer it, praying Abel would started wailing again. He looked back at Isla and his baby boy still fast asleep on the sofa, Isla's arms wrapped underneath Abel to stop him rolling off her chest. He couldn't help but smile at the scene in front of him. When the door bell rang again, Jax all but ran to the front door and yanked it open.

"What?!" he snapped not registering who was stood at his door.

"Well good morning to you too!" Tara glared at him. "What happened Jax? I thought we were meeting this morning?" Jax looked at his burner and couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty.

"Look Tara, I'm sorry, I just had a really rough night with Abel, guess I over slept!" he sighed and Tara nodded seeming to be happy with that excuse until Abel started crying again in the front room and Isla could be heard comforting him.

"Come on baby boy; let's not have another repeat of last night!"

"Really?" Tara all but hissed at Jax "She spent the night here with you? Where did she even sleep?" Jax sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"It's not like that Tara, she came over to help me with Abel and we slept on the sofa!" the second the words came out of his mouth, he kicked himself mentally.

"You slept on the sofa _together?_ And you didn't think you could ring me?" Tara folded her arms and glared at Jax "You know what, enjoy your morning together because I don't think there's any reason for me to stick around here!" She turned on her heel and left before Jax could get another word in edge ways.

Deciding it would be best if he just let her go and calm down, Jax headed back inside letting the door click shut quietly behind him, he found Isla leaning against the kitchen counter giving Abel his first bottle of the day.

"I'm sorry" she muttered looking up at Jax. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble or anything" He shook his head.

"No problem here Darlin' " Jax shrugged it off not wanting to say anything. He'd only found out three weeks ago that Tara was back in town and since him and Isla hadn't been speaking for two weeks he'd had a chance to spend a little bit of his time with Tara. This all seemed to be getting very complicated very quickly and Jax wasn't sure he liked where it was going.

"So anyway how did you enjoy your birthday party?" Jax decided he'd rather have that conversation than the one he seemed to be heading for. Isla made a face at him as shifted Abel in her arms.

"Are you kidding me? I collapsed and Chibs had to put me to bed because no one was sober enough to drive me home! I was literally out cold and then I found him and Gemma having a conversation about how Chibs wished he could have been there for Kerri-Ann like that!" She laughed at the strange look that appeared on Jackson's face.

"I know, I was so embarrassed!" Jax felt sick as he looked down at the petite blonde in front of him. Of course Isla hadn't slept with Chibs how could he have been so stupid? It felt as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders that was immediately followed by a wave of panic and Jax couldn't help but feel as though his head was going to explode with all the dizzying thoughts chasing around it.

Why was it that every time Jax thought about Isla he got the strangest feeling in his chest? Wasn't this the same feeling he had once gotten with Tara? What was he going to do about Tara?

 ** _A/N: I'm sorry for the break everyone, work and Christmas prep has made me a little crazy. I feel as if this chapter isn't up to my usual standard and I know it's not as long but I would love to get everyone's opinions on it? Have also been thinking of doing a little Isla/Jax Christmas one shot?_**

 ** _Can't wait to hear what you all think!_**

 ** _L xo_**


	10. Chapter 9

**_Chapter 9_**

"He's getting out Isla! Bobby is coming home tonight!"

Isla looked up from the files she was holding to see Gemma stood in the office door way and she couldn't help but feel incredibly guilty. Bobby had been locked up by some ATF bitch for weeks and she'd barely even missed him, she'd been so caught up in her own little world. Suddenly feeling horribly selfish, she pushed the invasive thoughts from her head and turned her attention away from her work.

"That's so great! What—"before she could ask what they were going to do to celebrate, Gemma cut her off

"Seriously? Are you really going to ask that? Put those files down and come on! We've got a party to organise!" Isla at least looked sheepish as she put the files down. It was a pretty stupid question, so enough she was in the club house counting up kegs and making a list of things for the sweet butts to go and pick up before Bobby arrived back. Gemma watched with a slight smirk thinking how if she wasn't careful Isla would be doing her job without even knowing it. The girl sure seemed more comfortable with club life than her mother had been.

Only a few hours had passed when Isla spotted the unmistakable cop car pulling into the TM lot, using her fingers she let out a piercing whistle, catching Clay's attention who was standing with a beer already in his hand. She nodded towards the car that had rolled to a stop before them. The blonde ATF agent that had been snooping around the club got out the front seat, her colleague out the driver's side. When they opened the back door for none other than Bobby Elvis to get out a cheer went up from the group of people that had gathered outside the clubhouse in wait.

Isla couldn't help but laugh in delight. She jumped down from her perch atop one of the picnic tables and darted through the crowd to the grey-fuzzy haired man that was the centre of everyone's attention.

"Welcome home Bobby!" Isla gave him a quick hug which left the older biker reeling with surprise. This was not the same girl he had seen some week previously, but there was no time to think about that as he was pulled into the arms of his brothers and welcomed home in true SAMCRO fashion.

"No what could a pretty little thing such as you possibly be doing hanging around with a bunch of bikers like this? And wearing so many clothes?" Isla looked around to find the ATF agent practically breathing down her neck. She took an immediate step back from the woman suddenly feeling very uncomfortable

"Umm...—"

"Isla?! Come on lass!" She shrugged apologetically at the agent and went to greet Chibs at the entrance to the clubhouse where a few other bikers stood, shooting daggers at the ATF agents who had clearly overstayed their welcome.

"Stay clear of that crazy bitch, you hear me lass?" Isla rolled her eyes as Chibs scolded her but she nodded anyway, glancing back at the woman who was still watching her closely before stepping into the safety of the clubhouse.

"Thank me later!" Jax muttered as he grabbed Isla by the shoulders and pushed her towards the ladder that led to the roof. "I just figured you wouldn't want a repeat of your birthday!" The blonde biker smirked down at her as the passed the bar where a row of shots had already been lined up. She blushed and climbed the ladder without protest, hoping that Jax wouldn't notice the pink flush of her cheeks.

SOASOASOASOA

"Yeah well maybe your son just has mad love for me, I mean who wouldn't?!" Isla giggled and took another swig from the bottle of whiskey she was holding in her hand and Jax couldn't help but grin at her. He had to admit she'd got him there. The two of them had spent the last two and a half hours sat on the rooftop talking whilst the party carried on down below them.

"You don't have to tell me!" Jax rolled his eyes at her and smirked for a moment before snatching the whiskey back and taking a long slug. When he put the bottle back and looked back to the girl perched on a ledge beside him he found her staring intently right back.

"What?"

"Jax why have you been ignoring me for the last two weeks?" he sighed, the alcohol was making her brave.

"It's not that I've been ignoring you Isles...I've just had a lot to do, with the club. You know?" she raised one perfectly arched eyebrow and shrugged.

"Sure" Jax knew she didn't believe him.

"Look, I've just had a lot to think about with the club. The direction that Clay is pulling us in. I just don't feel as though this is what my father had in mind when he started this whole thing." Why was he telling her this? Next he'd be telling her about the old journal's he'd found in the storage locker.

"Oh? What makes you say that?" Isla's curiosity was getting the better of her already. Jax just shrugged and smiled.

"I dunno, like I said, just been doing a lot of thinking." Seeming a little more satisfied with his answer Isla huffed,

"Yeah well next time, _think_ you could possibly take 2 minutes to drop me a text?" she smirked and leaned over to grab the bottle from the other side of Jax. As she did Jax breathed in letting that scent he loved so much invade his nostrils

"You wanna get out of here?" The words were out of Jax' mouth before he even realised he'd spoken. Isla looked at him for a few seconds before nodding and following Jax down the ladder, leaving the bottle of whiskey forgotten on the rooftop.

SOASOASOASOA

"Jax don't let me fall off okay?"

Jax was glad Isla couldn't see the grin on his face as he wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Darlin' you have nothing to worry about" he smirked and pulled out the lot, leaving the party to continue behind them.

As Jax drove through the streets of Charming, Isla held on as if her life depended on it. She could still feel the buzz from the alcohol in her system, with the wind wiping around them and the smell of leather and cigarettes filling her nostrils she couldn't help but smile at how the night had turned out. She flexed her arms thinking about the different emotions running through her at the moment; was it just from the alcohol? Was it just because she'd been spending so much time with him? Suddenly it hit her and Isla felt giddy from the realisation. _She loved him_

As they pulled into his street Jax spotted a very familiar cutlass parked on the street behind his mother's Cadillac and his stomach rolled. Why was Tara here? Deciding not to say anything he parked his bike on the drive and made his way to the front door, feeling more and more nervous every step he took.

"Hello ma?" he called out to Gemma and when she appeared he let out a sigh. Gemma teller did not look pleased.

"Hiya Gem!" Jax hadn't realised Isla was so close behind him, before anyone could say anything else Tara stepped into the light.

When Isla spotted the brunette, she froze. Why was Tara here? Hadn't Gemma told her there was nothing going on between her and Jax anymore? Suddenly she wondered if the whiskey she'd been drinking earlier that night was going to be throwing in another appearance.

And apparently Tara wasn't too pleased to see her either as the doctor looked as though she had swallowed something sour.

"Oh hello Isla, I didn't realise you were here too." Something in Tara's tone made Isla feel like she was still a child getting scolded for getting caught with her hand in the cookie jar. It was only when Gemma nudged her that Isla realised she hadn't responded to her.

"Sorry! Yeah, Jax was just giving me a lift back here so I could get a ride home with Gemma." She couldn't even look at Jax, scared of what she'd see in his face.

"I see" Tara didn't sound convinced "Well I just came over to talk to Jax."She looked to Gemma whose lips were set in a grim line.

"See you later baby" She kissed her son's cheek before taking Isla's hand "Come on sweetheart, you look dead on your feet" Ignoring the third woman, she led Isla out to the car, waved goodbye to Jackson and got in the car.

Tara had shown up at the door earlier that evening and confessed to Gemma that she and Jax had been spending a lot of time together since he'd found out she was back in town and she'd come over to tell him that she didn't think they should spend any more time together after seeing how much time Jax was also spending with Isla. Tara felt as though she might be getting herself into something that was trickier than it looked. Gemma had no problem admitting that didn't like Tara and whilst that was the case she agreed that it was wise for her and Jax not to spend any time together when he was obviously still struggling with parenthood and although Gemma wouldn't say anything she was still secretly hoping her son might find an old lady in Isla now the girl seemed to be growing into such a fantastic young woman after everything she had been through.

As they drove, Gemma kept stealing glances over at Isla who just stared distantly out the window.

"Everything okay baby?" She asked raising her eyebrows when Isla looked at her "Enjoy Bobby's party?" she turned her eyes back to the road, slowing at the upcoming stop sign.

"Yeah, I had a great time Gem. Me and Jax—"before she could finish her sentence a young blonde appeared at Gemma's window.

"Please help me! My baby is choking!" she cried hysterically. Isla and Gemma both unclipped their seatbelts and got out the car rushing to the minivan parked behind them. Gemma leant into the van with the tear stained blonde looking over her shoulder. Isla peered inside the van to see a plastic baby strapped into the car seat.

"What the-?" she heard Gemma's confusion and then her world went black.

SOASOASOASOA

"I said knock her out, not kill her!" The girl sighed in frustration, looking down at the unconscious woman at her feet with a bloody gash on her forehead, her accomplice just shrugged uncaring.

"Do we take her as well?" He asked in his gravelly voice, the girl ran a hand through her short blonde hair thinking for a moment, she recognised this woman from the papers. She'd heard about what she'd been through.

"No. We don't need her," She made a final decision, knowing what was in store for the biker queen decided that this woman had already felt enough of that pain.

"Come on let's get out of here!" Leaving the older girl on the floor she ran back to her minivan, making sure their target was completely unconscious before speeding away.

SOASOASOASOA

Wayne Unser closed the door to his car and looked around the lot, there were no cars or people anywhere in sight, and he pulled his gun just to be sure before proceeding cautiously towards the abandoned warehouse. Checking the door only to find it locked, he started to bang on the door.

"Gemma?!" He yelled out, having received an anonymous tip off that she may need his help Wayne wanted to make sure he was as thorough as possible in checking this out.

"Are you in there?!" he paused for a second and was about to go when he heard it.

"Way-Wayne! Wayne!" That was definitely Gemma's voice. Without a second thought he shot the lock to pieces and carried on inside, keeping his gun in front of him.

It didn't take him long to locate Gemma and when he did, the older man was shocked to his core,

"Oh my god!"

"Get-Get me out of here!" Gemma sobbed and he agreed running over and helping her cover herself, he got Gemma to her feet, quickly grabbed her scattered clothes and shoes and led her away from the grimy old building.

"How'd you know I was in there?" Gemma asked as they made their way back towards town.

"I heard it over the radio" Wayne seemed hesitant to tell her

"Anonymous tip?" he nodded sadly

"Yeah." He paused trying to think of the right words "You gotta tell me something here Gemma?"

She ignored him and looked around as they sped through the dark streets

"Where you goin?"

"St Thomas" came the clear reply and Gemma sighed, leaning back against the head rest.

"No." Wayne turned to the woman and looked at her as if she had just sprouted horns.

"We gotta get you to the hospital!"

"No hospital" Gemma sobbed a little as she shook her head, she hated to admit how much pain she was in.

"Well uh what am I supposed to do here Gemma?" Unser smacked his hands against the steering wheel in exasperation.

"Give me your cell." She muttered and dialled a number, the phone rang a couple of times and Gemma hated to admit she was nervous the good doctor wouldn't answer

"Hello?" Relief washed through her, quickly followed by annoyance as she could hear her son's sleepy voice in the background. That wasn't how she had hoped things would work out, and then she gasped.

"ISLA!"

"No. This is Tara" Came the annoyed response from the other end of the phone.

"Yeah I know!" Gemma spoke quickly before hanging up.

"Wayne, you need to take me home quickly! Tara will meet us there. Have you heard anything about Isla she was with me!" The woman couldn't hide her panic as she realised nothing had been mentioned about Isla since Wayne had found her. Unser nodded with understanding and stepped on the gas a little more.

SOASOASOASOA

Gemma licked her lips as Tara gently cleaned the wounds on her cheek.

"Did Jax see you leave?" she asked and was glad when Tara didn't even try and deny her whereabouts of the evening

"Told him that was the hospital" she muttered not wanting to touch that subject. "You need to tell me what happened so I can help you!" Gemma closed her eyes for a moment and took a small breath

"Use your imagination." She mumbled which made Tara stop and look at her with unmasked horror. At that moment Unser burst through the back door supporting Isla who was holding a piece of cloth to her own forehead. Gemma gave the younger girl a quick glance and let out a breath she hadn't even realised she'd been holding when she saw that aside from the gash on her head, Isla didn't look hurt.

Tara glanced up at the two of them, frowning at Isla who threw herself down on other couch across from them.

"Maybe we should let them rest?" Wayne piped up, and shrugged when Tara shot him daggers.

"We need to get her to a hospital"

"NO!" Gemma was firm about that,

"I can't treat you in my living room!" Tara was almost indignant

"Gunna have to check in, with all the insurance and shit. Everybody will know." Gemma licked her lips again and the room went quiet until a strange noise came from Isla making Tara get up to take a closer look at her head.

"Well, we'll just have to figure it out. I think Isla is concussed. I need to get her to a hospital! Isla! Stay with us! Don't fall asleep!" Wayne leaned over and pulled Isla up into a standing position as Tara started to pack up her stuff again.

"Promise me, you won't tell anyone."

"Gemma—"

"Promise!" Gemma cut Tara's next words off.

"We gotta tell Clay!" Wayne couldn't believe what he was hearing

"Not Clay, Not Jax. No one" Wayne sighed and shrugged knowing he wasn't going to win this battle.

"Alright." Tara sighed and nodded in agreement as she gathered up the rest of her stuff. "They're going to see their faces!" She whispered to Unser who was looking between the two injured women uneasily.

"I know. Just stay with them!" he told her firmly and turned to leave, a plan already formed in his mind.

SOASOASOASOA

"Hey!" Jax strode up to Tara, who smiled brightly back at him, pressing a small kiss to his cheek. Jax blinked at her.

"How are Isla and my mom doing?" Tara's smiled faltered ever so slightly at the obvious concern Jax had for everyone's favourite little blonde.

"Gemma is fine, just a few cuts and bruises, nothing that won't heal" she lied quickly with a tight smile. "Isla took a pretty hard bash to the head, doctor is seeing her now, thinks she may be suffering with some mild concussion, but doesn't look like anything too serious either!" Tara watched as Jax' shoulders seemed to loosen and he visibly relaxed.

"That's great. Thanks for this Tar. I'll catch you later okay" He flashed her one of his brilliant Jax Teller smiles before turning on his heel.

Jax opened the door and crept into the room where the doctor was finishing up his examination on Isla.

"If you start to feel dizzy or nauseous, or anything odd please come straight back to us" he heard the doctor say in a very firm voice "We'll be keeping you in for the next 24 hours just to make sure there's no swelling or bleeding, but providing everything looks okay, you'll be free to go tomorrow." He finished up and Isla nodded.

"Okay thank you" Once the doctor had left, Jax was able to get a proper look at Isla. The gash on her head didn't look so bad anymore now all the excess blood had been cleaned off her.

"How you feeling Darlin'?" He could tell as he sat down that she was exhausted, but even with a large cut on her forehead and deprived of sleep Jax couldn't help thinking of how pretty the girl in front of him looked.

"I'm fine, honestly!" Isla smiled softly up at Jax and rubbed her forehead, "How's your mom doing?" Although Isla hadn't said anything she remembered the conversation between Tara, Gemma and the police Chief earlier that day. Jax assured her that his mom was okay too and although Isla didn't completely believe him she sat back and let herself relax, drifting in and out of sleep with Jax clutching her hand and rubbing his thumb over her knuckles soothingly.

With Isla soon asleep and Jax watching her so intently, neither of them noticed the brunette doctor watching from outside the hospital room, her hands stuffed in her white coat pockets. As Tara stared through the window she realised that she wasn't the only girl in Jax Teller's life and it almost seemed to her, this innocent little thing Jax wrapped round her little finger without even knowing it and for that Tara resented her. With one final glare through the window, she stalked off in the direction of her office still thinking about the man she thought she loved and the girl she seemed to be competing against.

 ** _A/N: I know this is my longest chapter yet and I'm a little worried it may seem rushed, so please bear with me! Obviously I've changed things slightly from how they were in the show. Can't wait to hear everyone's thoughts!_**


	11. Chapter 10

**_Chapter 10_**

"Hey Lass! I didn't know you were out the hospital!" Chibs stood up from the sofa he and Juice were occupying at the back of Luann's porn studio to greet Isla with a quick hug, his eyes darting back to the scene being filmed behind the petit blonde

"Yep, head's not too damaged so they let me go" she joked "Came up to see how Luann was doing at the new place" Isla gazed around the newly renovated studio, trying not to focus on the porn set itself although she snickered noticing how the two sons in front of her could barely keep their eyes off the scene.

"You're a bad boss Mr Draper!" Lyla smirked down at the man bent over in front of her, slapping the shoe in her hand against his backside.

"Yeah just like that...yeah mommy! Yeah mommy! Yeah harder!" the man moaned and the two mean sat beside Isla snickered together which made her smile

"Alright, big finish Lyla!" Luann called out to the girl from her director's chair. Everyone at the back of the room watched on with slight curiosity as Lyla drained a bottle of whiskey behind her before sticking the bottle where the sun certainly did not shine.

"Ouch!" Isla, Chibs and Juice all cringed as the porn star let out a guttural scream before the bell rang.

"Alright!" Luann sounded pleased as she jumped out her chair "check it!" she called out, offering an encouraging smile to her camera crew.

"Bravo!" Chibs and Juice stood up and clapped to the cast making Luann glanced warily over her shoulder and locked eyes with her niece, both making the same face at each other, the two women giggled before embracing one another

"Baby girl! It's been a while" How ya feeling?" Isla nodded up at her aunt and smiled.

"I'm all good! Honest!" she grinned at her aunt's questioning look. "I actually came up here to see if you wanted to go for lunch with me?" the look of delight on Luann's face at the thought of spending time with her made Isla's smile widen.

"Yes! That sounds wonderful hon—Bobby? What are you doing here?"

Isla turned to see Bobby Elvis walking through the door with a look on his face that could only mean trouble and she knew it was entirely possible her plan for lunch had just gone straight out the window.

An hour passed and Isla found herself still sat on the sofa with Juice watching as her aunt stormed around the studio, huffing and puffing.

"How much are you willing to bet than Bobby's going to win this argument?" Juice asked with a smirk watching as the older man seemed to be making himself pretty comfortable in the office, Chibs in the room adjacent to him, pacing up and down with his burner pressed against his ear. On the phone to Jax no doubt.

"No way!" Isla looked at the murderous glares her aunt kept throwing in the direction of Bobby Elvis "Luann will go bat shit crazy!" She turned to look at Juice who just smirked and shook his head.

"Ten dollars says you're wrong!" Isla narrowed her eyes at the Puerto Rican "Oh you're on!" the two of them sat back both feeling very confident in their own bets as they watched Luann shrieking down the phone to someone else, whilst Chibs was obviously trying to reason with her.

Before long, Chibs' phone rang again and he and Juice were called away leaving Isla to just sit back and watch as her aunt and the old biker screamed at each other in the office until the sound of another motorcycle outside caught her attention and within seconds Jax strode through the door, flashing Isla one of his most charming smiles.

"Hey Darlin—" He was stopped dead when Luann caught sight of him and marched over, her heels clicking against the cold concrete floor.

"This is bullshit!" She cried "A manager? I'm getting shut out of my own business!"

"I'm just here to do the book keeping Darlin!" Bobby threw his hands up in exasperation as he peered over his glasses at the porn queen.

"Did you sign off on this?!" Luann basically ignored Bobby and spun back to Jax, her blue eyes flashing. He looked at her for a moment 'calculating what answer would bring him less trouble' Isla thought to herself

"It was a club decision" Jax finally answered and Luann seethed

"Like I need this hassle, I gotta finish this shoot, post an anal rain dance and prep a sorority swing!"

"Well look at it this way; Bobby handling the admin frees you up to do all the important shit" Luann glared at him and Isla had to admit he had her there "What's an anal rain dance?" He smirked and that was more than Isla could take, giggles erupted from her lips causing Jax to smirk over at her.

Out in the parking lot, Tara sat against Jackson's bike staring at her phone as a white Lexus pulled up and yet another one of Luann's girls jumped out the driver's side.

"Uh shouldn't you be polishing that bike sweetie? Jax likes it nice and shiny!" She smirked to herself and dashed inside to see her favourite biker, leaving Tara glaring after her in disgust.

Ima Tite had a thing for Jax, everyone knew that but the porn star didn't care, all she wanted was to let Jax in her knickers and every now and then she would get her way. She darted inside the studio, twiddling one of her strawberry blonde pig tails, plotting how she could get the bikers undivided attention but stopped dead when she spotted him sat on a sofa next to Luann's niece.

The porn star huffed; She didn't dislike Isla, the girl was just so...nice but Ima knew with her around Jax would barely notice anyone else, that's just how things had worked recently. With everyone knowing who she was and knowing what she had been through Isla was respected by the vast majority of crow eaters and sweet butts at the club house but even the porn stars wouldn't try it on with Jax when Isla was around. So giving an exaggerated sigh, Ima took off her jacket and went to greet her boss.

Back out in the parking lot, Tara once again looked up from her phone as both Gemma and Clay pulled into the lot, this couldn't be good.

"What the hell you doing here?" Clay sounded pissed as Gemma got out her car.

"Luann called, she's freaking out" Gemma rolled her eyes at her husband, glad she had her back to him

"It's club business!" As they got closer to Cara Cara, Tara couldn't hear the underlying annoyance in Clay's voice "You got no reason to intervene!" It was Gemma's turn to look annoyed; she turned back to her husband and started to explain as if she were talking to a small child

"Wouldn't intervene, she's my friend, she needs to talk" Gemma turned back

"Oh so when she wants to talk, you what? Drop everything?" Clay was definitely pissed.

"Jesus Christ! What are you? Three?"

"Get back to the garage!" Clay cut her off. Gemma looked furious

"Excuse me?" Tara felt slightly uncomfortable as Tig pulled up and came to sit against Jax' bike beside her. The two of them openly watching the argument unfolding before them

"Last thing I need is for you running diva over a god damn cum factory!"

"Asshole!" Gemma snarled at him before turning back to the studio and walking away before anyone could say or do anything, Clay turned round and grabbed one of the concrete building blocks stacked behind him and threw it at Gemma's car, smashing the window.

"You stupid piece if shit!" She screamed, turning back to him and kicking his precious bike. Tara jumped up knowing this was not going to end well and darted inside the porn studio, looking around

"Jax?" She called out and started running towards where he and Isla were sat on the sofa still laughing at something, she couldn't help the anger the coursed through her veins when she spotted the two of them together and that feeling only intensified when Ima moved to block her path

"He's occupied honey; you should wait outside like you were told!"

"Oh shit," Jax looked up from his conversation and sighed seeing the two women ahead. Isla followed his gaze and couldn't help but feel a little put out when she noticed the brunette doctor, she sighed and decided to head for the door

"I'm sorry!" Jax grabbed Tara's arm and pulled her away from Ima before either of them caused any real damage

"Yeah well, she's not the only one!" Tara growled and turned back to the parking lot where Gemma and Clay's arguing was getting louder and louder.

"Just what those arthritic mitts need, a good pounding!" Gemma screamed at her husband as he bashed his fists against the bonnet of her car

"You wanna see a good pounding?" he threw back at her just as Jax, Tara and Isla all appeared at the door, followed by Luann and a couple of porn stars

"Oh yeah, come on badass, lay a hand on me!" Gemma was a force to be reckoned with "I'll slit your god damn throat! You are pathetic!" She screamed and turned away again only for Clay to grab her by the shoulders and turn her around.

"Don't you touch me!" Gemma screamed and Jax look at his mother in shock as she began to sob hysterically, Isla moved over to Gemma and put a hand on her arm, surprised when the older woman leaned against her for support. Gemma Teller who was usually so strong. Isla looked up and caught Tara's eye and was too surprised to see her own expression of understanding and sympathy mirrored on the doctor's face.

SOASOASOASOA

 _You owe me ten dollars!_

Isla read the text and put her phone in her back pocket with a roll of her eyes. Damn Juice.

"Here you go!" Isla bought out a strong coffee from the kitchen and gave it to Gemma who smiled gratefully.

"Thanks sweetheart, I appreciate this!" she took the cup from the younger girl who plonked herself down beside her and just nodded, knowing nothing much she could say would bring Gemma any real comfort so instead she went and picked up a crying Abel from his crib before bringing him back to the living room and sitting down beside Gem.

After a strong coffee and an hour or so of her grandson gurgling happily beside her, Isla was glad to see the matriarch seemed to be calmer.

"So how's your head feeling baby?" Gemma asked and looked round at Isla, it was the first time the two of them had been alone since the attack and suddenly the blonde was very conscious of the fact.

"I'm okay Gemma!" she took a deep breath and looked her friend straight in the eye "Are you?" her voice was very quiet "I vaguely remember the journey to St Thomas"

Gemma's mouth dropped open at this new piece of information. Unser, Tara and herself had all just assumed Isla was unconscious for that entire journey.

"But...Sweetheart? You haven't said anything?" Gemma, for once, was lost for words. Isla just shrugged and turned her attention back to Abel who was curled up quite happily in the gap between Isla's crossed legs and starting to fall asleep.

"It's not my place to say anything Gem and I won't but..." she bit her lip "If I can do anything? Maybe you should talk to someone about what happened?" Isla understood enough about the club now to know this wasn't something that Gemma would report to the cops but she couldn't help but worry about how the secret could eat her up, she knew all too well how it could feel. Dark eyes stared down at her, a small smile on her face as she watched the girl who was cradling her grandson.

"No baby, I just need a little bit of time" she murmured "I haven't slept with Clay since." Isla nodded, she understood that.

"Time heals all wounds" she murmured and Gemma gave her a sideways glance knowing then that if, after everything she had been through, Isla of all people could say that, then maybe there was some truth to it.

SOASOASOASOA

"Isla? What are you doing here Darlin'?" Jax closed his front door and smiled softly down at the girl who was draped across one of his sofas.

"Hmm? Sorry!" Isla sat up and smiled, rubbing her eyes a little sleepily. "Your mom sent Neeta home early" suddenly she looked a little nervous "I can go if you want?" Jax was surprised. Why on earth would she think he wanted her to leave?

"No, stay." He answered a little too quickly. "Where is ma?" he looked around, expecting to see his mother somewhere in his house.

"She actually went home not long ago; I think she just needs some rest. She's still got a lot of pain" Isla explained cautiously and Jax nodded understanding.

"Clay is going to stay at the clubhouse tonight, there's a party up at Cara Cara anyway, so at least we don't have to worry about one of them killing the other!" Isla giggled and Jax grinned. How he loved the sound of her giggles.

"You didn't want to stay for the party? Who are you and where's the real Jax Teller?" It was Jax' turn to laugh

"Well how could I possibly stay for a party when the prettiest girl in Charming is already at my house?" Isla blushed and felt something stir inside her as he sat down beside her. Jax slung an arm around Isla and pulled her close, pressing a quick kiss against her forehead he breathed in the smell he had grown to love. Isla smiled to herself and settled down against Jackson's chest, turning her attention back to the TV. They sat peacefully for a few minutes until Abel's crying could be heard on the baby monitor and Isla got up to go and see to him.

The second she picked the baby up and started to rub his back, the loud shrieking turned to a pitiful mewling.

"You know I think the little man might be a bit colicky." Jax mused; he had overheard Gemma saying something to Luann a few days before about his son and Colic. Isla nodded and smiled.

"Don't worry papa bear, he'll grow out of it" she reassured him and Jax wondered briefly how she knew that before he went to stand beside her, wrapping on arm around her waist.

"If you say so Iles"

SOASOASOASOA

The party at Cara Cara was in full swing when Tara pulled up in her cutlass; she sighed as she got out slamming the door behind her and made her way over to the entrance, yanking the door open she stepped inside to be greeted by the loud music and haze of cigarette smoke. Tara looked around trying to spot Jax and barely made it a few steps when someone stuck their leg out to stop her.

Ima pushed herself up from the sofa and smoothed out her short blue dress. Who did this bitch think she was, just showing up to one of their wrap parties uninvited? When Jax hadn't showed up Ima had asked Lyla if she knew where the blonde biker god was, much to her chagrin Lyla had explained that Jax was at home with Isla and Abel, Jax was making her dinner whilst Isla helped him looked after a colicky baby. This bad news had left Ima with a sour taste in her mouth and in a vile mood, this skinny little doctor bitch didn't stand a chance.

"This is a closed party" She snarled at Tara who stopped with surprise

"I'm looking for Jax." Ima laughed

"Honey, he's got all he can handle tonight don't worry!" Tara gritted her teeth at the porn star,

"Yeah I'm sure he does!" she tried to push past Ima who very quickly got up in Tara's face.

"I said get out bitch! Jax isn't here" Ima couldn't conceal her delight at Tara's angry confusion "He's at home having dinner with Isla and his baby" Tara seemed to go a little pale at this but she took a step back admitting defeat which only made Ima's smirk widen as she turned on her heel and left the porn studio

"That's right, you better run you little skank!" Ima shouted after her, the satisfaction evident in her voice.

SOASOASOASOA

"I hope you like spaghetti and meatballs!" Jax announced as he sat down on the sofa beside Isla who was so engrossed in the film showing on TV she barely noticed him until he held the plate of food right under her nose.

"Ohh yum! Did you make this?" Isla raised an eyebrow and took the tray from him. Jax laughed softly and feigned hurt.

"Such surprise! I'll have you know I'm an excellent cook!" he grinned and started to dig into his own food which by all accounts wasn't actually that bad.

"Yeah okay master chef!" Isla grinned and dug into her food without hesitation, only just realising how hungry she was. For a while they ate in a comfortable silence until Isla looked round and caught Jax staring at her.

"What? Do I have sauce on my face?" Jax laughed and shook his head

"No Darlin', Listen Iles I'm really sorry about these past couple of weeks. Not talking to you, trying to straighten things out with Tara" He wasn't entirely sure where he was going with this.

"I knew you were ignoring me!" She interrupted him indignantly which made Jax smile sheepishly.

"I know, I'm sorry! It's just been a strange couple of weeks" Jax shrugged and Isla nodded.

"Its okay" she smiled and took another mouthful of her food.

"But if this gives me food poisoning I probably won't be so forgiving!" Jax smirked down at her and put his empty plate down on the floor.

"Seriously though, this is good. Thank you" Isla stood and picked up his plate before taking them both through to the kitchen and filling the sink with some warm soapy water. Jax smiled softly and followed her through, turning the tap off he hooked an arm around her slender waist.

"Leave it Isla, come watch this movie, I wanna burrito" he pulled a surprised Isla back through to the living room and picked up a throw, wrapping it around them both before lying down on the sofa with Isla on top of him. An Isla and Jax burrito, the thought made him smile.

For once Jax didn't mind that he had traded a party for a night in and especially with Isla, granted there was no sex but for some reason that didn't matter. Just lying with Isla wrapped up beside him, her blonde hair tickling his neck as she slowly fell asleep in front of the TV; that was enough for Jax.

 ** _A/N: So happy I've finished this chapter so as per please read and review my lovelies. As ever I look forward to your thoughts. Next chapter will be a more Christmas themed chapter and then I probably won't post anything until the New Year depending on how much free time I have. Love to you all! Hope everyone is just as excited for Christmas as I am!_**


	12. Chapter 11

**_Chapter 11_**

"So Isla baby, are you okay with deserts?" Gemma asked her little helper as she put away the last of the files on her desk and locked the cabinet. Isla laughed and nodded.

"I think I can manage!" the younger girl flashed her pearly whites and closed down the laptop she had been working on. It was Christmas Eve and the two women had decided to close the office a bit earlier than originally planned as there was still so much to be done before the big dinner that Gemma had planned for the next day. It was tradition for her to do Christmas dinner and this year was no exception. With a nod she leaned over to press a small kiss to Isla's cheek.

"Okay, call me if you need me!" She smiled before making her way out to her car and speeding out the TM parking lot. Isla waved goodbye before turning back to her work station and pausing for a moment. She hugged herself with childish excitement before packing away the laptop and tidying up the office. Before her abduction, Christmas had always been her favourite time of year, regardless of the winter sunshine the air was cold and crisp, just the way Isla liked it. She threw on a knitted cardigan that had once belonged to her mother and with one last glance around; she locked up the office and dashed out to the SUV she had recently purchased after passing her driving test.

It was almost noon when Isla reached Jax' house having decided she would go over and finish wrapping the gifts she had bought away from Gemma and Luann's prying eyes. Pulling out a bag that had a few presents in it Isla slammed the door shut and locked the car before dancing into the house. She felt so festive and absolutely nothing was going to kill her mood today.

Isla stretched up on her tiptoes and felt around for the key that she knew Jax had hidden above his front door and let herself in before replacing it exactly where she'd found it.

"Hello?" she called out and was surprised when Neeta greeted her from the kitchen.

"Hello sweet girl!" the older woman looked up from her coffee with a smile, "What are you doing here? I thought you were helping Gemma at the office?" Isla snorted in response

"I could ask you the same thing! It's Christmas Eve, why are you here and not at home?"She grinned placing the bag down on the side and going to grab the wrapping paper and tape she had hidden down the back of Jax' sofa.

Neeta laughed "Someone had to watch the little man, he's napping" she explained when Isla looked around for Abel.

"Oh Neeta! Go home! I'll watch him, I've got so much to do round here anyway!" she laughed and took great satisfaction in seeing the delight on her friend's face.

"Honey are you sure? I don't mind!" Isla shook her head in response and sat down on the floor surrounding herself with wrapping paper, ribbon and tape.

"I'm sure, go see your family!" she giggled again as Neeta jumped up and washed her cup up quickly. She didn't need telling twice.

After Neeta had gone Isla grabbed the baby monitor from the kitchen table and sat it behind her on the sofa whilst she sat on the floor and started to wrap. Just as she finished wrapping the hundred dollar bottle of whiskey and plaque that read 'ride it like you stole it' for Jax, the devil himself walked in.

"Isla? Darlin' what're you doing here? Where's Neeta?"

Isla who had been so lost in tying the most perfect ribbon she could from the strip of blue silk ribbon jumped when Jackson spoke;

"Jesus Christ Jax!" she held a hand to her heart and laughed "You tryna give me a heart attack or something?" The blonde biker smirked down at her before kicking off his trainers and sitting down on the sofa behind her "I'm commandeering your house" she announced looking over her shoulder at him.

"Needed somewhere to wrap these and make desserts later" she waved a hand vaguely towards the pile of half wrapped presents beside her.

"Uh huh and what are those ones?" he looked at the pile that clearly had his name written on them and gave Isla a wicked smile. She narrowed her eyes at him and shook her head.

"Not telling! You'll find out tomorrow!" Jax narrowed his own blue eyes in return and then sighed

"Just as well I bought you a present too then isn't it?" He laughed at Isla's murderous glare and pointed to the tiny little package that was beautifully wrapped beneath his minimalist Christmas tree. Isla immediately dropped the purse she had bought for Gemma and lay down on her stomach to inspect it.

"Wow Jax did you wrap this too?" she asked shaking the little box and trying to figure out what was inside. Shaking his head with amusement Jax couldn't help but snicker

"No Darlin' got it gift wrapped" he watched as Isla shrugged giving up on trying to guess and put her present back under the tree before turning back to her own pile of unwrapped gifts. He was impressed as she taped down the paper with ease and scrawled another name on the package before tossing it into the finished pile

"Aw hell!" Gemma. Seeing the name on the present reminded Jax he only had one more night to buy his mother a present, at Isla's questioning look he sighed;

"Still haven't got moms present. Don't know what to get her" Jax admitted sheepishly and sat back against the sofa looking around for inspiration.

"Well there's a pair of boots she's been going on about in Cole's" Isla mused "They were like two hundred dollars though" She shrugged started to put some of the finished presents into a bag ready to take to Gemma and Clay's on Christmas day.

"Well let's pray they're still there when Abel wakes up from his nap then!" The price of the boots didn't bother Jax, at least he had an idea on what to get.

SOASOASOASOA

"You're in luck, this is my last pair!" The shop assistant smiled as he rung up the amount on the till "Did you want these gift wrapped?"

"Yes!" Jax answered at the same time as Isla's "no thank you!" Could be heard from the other side of the shop, she peered round the piles of stacked up shoe boxes and shook her head at him.

"Don't bother, I'll do it when we get home Jax." He just shrugged and smiled at her.

"Okay no worries Darlin' " Pulling out his wallet, Jax paused before looking back to Isla who was staring up at the shoes on the wall, balancing Abel on her hip.

 _'When we get home'_ her words echoed in his head and Jax smiled. She saw his house as her home?

As they stepped out the warm shop into the colder street, Isla pulled Abel's hat over his ears and hugged him to her chest a little tighter, before looking to his father

"Got everything you want now?" Jax grinned and nodded happily "Okay, I just need to pop into the grocery store before we go, I need to grab a couple of things" she told him as they walked down the street together.

Later that afternoon Isla snapped the over door shut as she pulled the freshly baked apple pie out and sat it at the back of the stove on a cooling rack. She wiped her forehead and put the oven gloves down on the kitchen table before turning around to admire her handy work. One large apple pie, 2 trays of brownies, 3 bowls of jelly and a trifle later she was finally done with the desserts for Christmas day and she'd even had time to make a batch of cookies using the recipe that she Emily used when she was a child.

Isla stopped for a moment and stared out the window as she remembered;

 _"Mama! These cookies aren't right either!" Ten year old Isla threw down her chocolate chip biscuit in defeat and peeked up at her mother who was staring down at the kitchen table covered in the baked goods. Emily picked a small cookie and took a small bite out of it, testing the crunch._

 _"Baby read through ingredients again, Tell me exactly what you put in." She smiled knowingly down at her daughter who huffed and picked up the recipe book again_

 _"But mama I didn't miss anything!" Emily just pointed to the recipes book again and knowing there was no point in arguing with her, Isla started to read " 125 grams of softened butter, 100 grams of light brown soft sugar, 125 grams of caster sugar," For every ingredient that the little girl read out Emily would hold up a finger, mentally ticking it off on her head "1 egg, 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract..Oh!" Realisation dawned and without another word Isla ran back to her scales and started measuring out the ingredients again._

Isla jumped slightly when something soft and warm touched her cheek, bringing her attention back into the room. It was Jax, standing in front of her with a concerned frown on his face.

"Darlin' what's wrong?" He wiped his thumb across her cheek again and Isla realised a few salty tears had escaped and trailed down her cheek.

"I was just thinking about my ma" she whispered and understanding shone in Jax' eyes, without another word he pulled her against his chest and wrapped his arms around her slender body, nuzzling her head. Isla sniffed and wiped at her eyes, Emily wouldn't want her to be sad anymore.

"Your mom would be so proud of you Iles" Jax whispered and kissed her forehead, he held her close for a little while longer before shifting slightly. Isla looked up at him to find he had managed to sneakily pick up a cookie without her noticing and was chomping his way through it. He gave her a sheepish smile knowing the game was up and shoved the rest of the cookie in his mouth before she could protest. With a sigh she rolled her eyes and slapped his arm.

"Thank you Jax." Isla was sincere again as she wiped her cheeks a final time and started to put away the biscuits and desserts before he could snaffle anymore.

SOASOASOASOA

"Little man go down okay?" Jax looked up as Isla tiptoed back into the living room having just put his son to sleep; she smiled softly at him and nodded.

"Well get over here then, the Grinch who stole Christmas is just about to start" Isla laughed softly and nodded

"I would never put you down as a Dr. Seuss fan." She giggled and sat down beside Jax who pulled her a little closer and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. For a moment Isla lost herself in the smell of cigarettes, leather and men's shower gel and snuggled into Jax' side before she snapped out of her trance like state.

"Hmm?" Jax looked down at her with his usual cocky smirk

"I said are you feeling tired?" he repeated "We can go to bed if you want?" Jax waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively

"In your dreams Teller!" Isla laughed and slapped his chest playfully, only for Jax to grab hold of her hand.

"I love the sound of your laugh" He murmured, his own deep blue eyes locked on her face. Isla looked up at him with surprise, and dropped her own eyes as soon as she met his gaze. She could feel the warmth of her blush as it crept across her cheeks and knew her crimson face wasn't going to hide a thing.

"I love it when you blush too!" Jax caught hold of her chin with his index finger and raised her face to look at him, this time she didn't drop her gaze but stared into his eyes boldly. Isla was acutely aware of him drawing closer and closer to her at every passing second; she felt his free hand caressing her cheek, whilst the other was pressed firmly against the small of her back pulling her closer and closer.

Jax dipped his head and kissed her; the feel of her lips against his was electrifying, even the slightest touch sent him spiralling. The kiss was gentle and short-lived much to his dismay, maybe she did not want to be kissed? He pulled back, feeling a little breathless, and looked at her for some kind of indicator to how she felt.

Isla's own forget-me-not blue eyes looked...turbulent, with so many different emotions shining through it was hard for Jax to decipher what they meant and then it was as if the tempest had broken loose, Isla found herself cupping his face with both of her delicate hands and pulling his lips back to hers. A storm of desire swept through her and whilst she knew it was wrong to want to kiss him, she lacked the will to withdraw.

Everything about this moment was wrong in her eyes and yet she couldn't deny that she never wanted it to end. With his lips against hers, she could hear the music playing faintly on the television or perhaps it was only her heart singing. Whatever it was Isla had never known anything as wondrous.

When they broke apart neither of them spoke a word, they just sat back watching the film that played on, wrapped up in each other's warm embrace.

When the film had long ended and Isla had been sleeping soundly on his chest for a good hour, Jax found himself still sat, lost in thought. He looked down at the sleeping girl and marvelled; Jackson Teller had kissed plenty of pretty girls and none of them had ever left him reeling like she did. Even Tara didn't make him feel like that. Pushing any thoughts of the brunette doctor from his head, he yawned and looked down at Isla; it was time for both of them to go to sleep. Sliding out from beneath her, Jax stood up and stretched before leaning over and carefully lifting Isla into his arms as if she were a small child. He carried her through to the bedroom and laid her down before pulling the quilt over her and tucking it around her. Then without making a sound, Jax crept back to his living room to turn off the TV and the lights on the Christmas tree that Isla had decorated a few weeks previously.

Staring at the couch for a moment Jax pondered; the gentlemanly thing to do would be to sleep on the sofa, but he was no gentleman so he grabbed the baby monitor and turned back towards his bedroom, clicking the door shut behind him. Stripping down to his boxers, Jax slid under the quilt only for Isla to shift around and attempt to bury her face in his chest. He felt his throat tighten and something inside his chest clench.

"I can hear you thinking" The sleepy voice beside him interrupted his thoughts and Jax couldn't help but smile fondly.

"Go to sleep Iles" he whispered and pulled the girl closer, kissing her fluffy blonde hair. Isla mumbled something unintelligible and was asleep again in seconds and Jax couldn't help but wonder; when was the last time he'd held a girl like this? Just slept together, no fucking involved. He couldn't remember but it didn't bother him. There was just something about Isla. He drifted into the best night's sleep he'd had in a really long time, his limbs tangled in with hers, and holding close to him the one girl that made him question everything.

SOASOASOASOA

It was a fairly warm Christmas day as Tara turned off the main road in her cutlass. She'd woken up early on this particular Christmas day and spent the day lounging a little before she'd gotten herself dressed and loaded up the small bag of presents that she had bought for Jax and Abel and decided to head over to their house, maybe they could all go for breakfast before Gemma's big soiree. She hadn't been invited but Tara had figured maybe she would get her invite this morning when he saw the presents she had picked out for him.

Tara pulled up a little way away from Jax' house but stopped dead when his front door opened and an all too familiar blonde stepped out holding a little boy against her chest and she was laughing. With her window rolled down, the doctor could hear everything clear as day.

"Jax come on! If we're late Gemma will kill us both and you know it!" She grinned and stood back from the SUV having buckled Abel safely in the back. She continued to watch as Jax himself appeared holding two very large bags that were filled to the top with presents.

"Gemma will kill me; your ass is pretty safe!" Jax pushed the boot closed and pressed a soft kiss to Isla's forehead before he opened the passenger side door for her and bowed as she stepped in

"Your carriage awaits my lady" He smirked as Isla smacked his shoulder playfully

"Dick!" She grinned and pulled her door shut.

Something dark twisted in Tara's stomach as she saw the smile on Jax' face, the way he walked as if he had a bit more of a spring to his step and then it seemed as if her heart stopped.

He loved her. Jax actually loved Isla.

Tara couldn't stop the sob that escaped her lips and the tears that cascaded down her face as the realisation sunk in. She was only second best to the blonde that was sat in the SUV driving past her with the man she loved the most. Tara hiccupped and tried to stop her uncontrollable sobbing wishing more than anything that she was the girl sat in that SUV, that she was in Isla's shoes.

SOASOASOASOA

Isla was sat on the floor leaning against Gemma's soft, with Jax sat on the sofa behind her and Abel lying against her knees, Ellie and Kenny sat beside her with their little eyes completely focused on the Santa Claus movie showing on TV. Isla knew she shouldn't be surprised at how many people had showed up after all this club was family.

Dinner had been a huge hit and everyone had loved Isla's desserts to the point Tig had asked Isla if she wanted to go home with him. Presents had been exchanged and nothing made Isla happier than seeing the delight on each person's face as they opened her gift to them. She looked up at Jax as he tugged one of her loose blonde curls

"You quite comfy down there Blondie?" He smirked and Isla just smiled and nodded, looking back to the children sitting around her. Kenny and Ellie were both falling asleep leaning against her but she wasn't about to disturb them, in fact having eaten such a good meal she was starting to feel pretty sleepy herself.

"Isla?" Opie shifted from his seat beside Jax and sat down on the floor beside his son/

"I just wanted to say thank you, I was so worried about this Christmas, you know, with it being the first one without D—"He couldn't finish his sentence but Isla got it. With it being the first Christmas without Donna. Everyone missed her.

"It's okay Ope, I miss her too" she whispered and squeezed Opie's arm. The biker nodded and looked down at his children before going out for a cigarette.

"You're awful good with those children baby girl" Isla looked up to meet her aunt's sparkly blue eyes and returned her smile.

"Yeah Lu, Isla's just a natural mother." Gemma came in carrying a tray of drinks and handed one out to everyone before Clay stood up and surveyed the room full of his family.

"I wanna thank each and every one of you for coming and spending this time with us. Christmas is for family and we count each and every one of you as family, Merry Christmas to you all!" Clay raised his glass as did everyone else in toast.

Isla took a drink and sat back against the sofa, letting Jax twiddle her loose curl. She looked down at the baby boy asleep in her lap and at the people sitting all around the room with her. Although Isla missed her own mother and wished more than anything that Emily was there with them, although she had been robbed of so many things in her life right now, Isla was more content than she had ever been. She absentmindedly twirled the beautiful silver necklace at her throat that had been her Christmas present from Jax and smiled to herself. This was her life now right here with this club and she had everything she needed. Isla sat back and reached up to squeeze Jax' hand before focusing her attention back to the movie playing in front of her.

"Happy Christmas to all and to all a good-night"

 ** _A/N: I've been so excited about writing this chapter and now it's done I'm a little bit sad. Won't be posting anything else until the New Year now I expect so please read and review! Have a very merry Christmas and a happy new year! xo_**


	13. Chapter 12

**_Chapter 12_**

"Gem?" Gemma Teller jumped at the sound of her name being called and turned to find Isla standing only a few feet away from her, concern etched into her face.

"Oh hey baby, I didn't hear you come in" Isla cocked her head to one side and stared at the matriarch for a moment before shrugging and picking up Abel out of his high chair. She was so absorbed in the little boy who had already wrapped his tiny little fist around the necklace from Jax that hung at her throat; she didn't notice the sigh of relief from the older woman. When the two women were taken to hospital after the attack, Tara had managed to get a few minutes alone with Isla to talk to her; she was told they had been attacked, she had been knocked out whilst Gemma was badly beaten.

Tara admitted to Isla it was a warning the club had done and was surprised when Isla didn't ask any questions or say anything to Jax but Gemma didn't complain although she still felt a lot of pain from her attack and sometimes it was hard to hide that from all her family.

"Hiya Isles!" Jax smiled as he walked through the door carrying a box in his hands "What're you doing here?" Wrapping an arm round her shoulders he pulled her in for a quick hug and kissed her forehead, before giving his son a kiss too.

"Came to see my favourite boy!" Isla smiled at Abel and then smirked when Jax covered his heart, feigning injury.

"Well you should know he gets all his good looks from his father!" Gemma watched their exchange and couldn't help her delight at how comfortable the two were around each other.

"Isles you take a box of clothes from the garage the other day when we were putting Christmas decorations away?" He asked leaning against the door frame ad Isla shook her head

"Haven't done anything out there" She shrugged and went back to cooing over the baby who by know had his tiny little fist wrapped tightly around the necklace Jax had given her for Christmas.

"I'm missing a box" Jax licked his lips

"Uhh I cleaned some shit out there before the baby came home, there was a box of laundry that her a serious stink to it." Gemma looked up at her son from her seat at the table.

"Well where is it?" Isla was surprised by the sharpness of Jax' tone, his mother just shrugged

"Tossed it," Gemma answered flippantly "just a bunch of old t-shirts, funky underwear." she put her coffee cup down with a clink and looked up with a strange look on her face, meeting her son's annoyed expression.

"Why? What're you looking for?" Isla couldn't help but watch the curious exchange.

"An old Harley manual, hard to find" Jax answered his eyes flashing as he looked back with a slight smirk on his face.

"Sorry" Her apology was anything but sincere; the room was still for a moment until Chibs walked through the door.

"Morning children!" In Jax' opinion the Scotsman sounded far too cheerful for 10am

"I thought the prospect was with you?"

A silly grin appeared on Chibs' face as he answered back "oh no no, wee man is under the knife today, he's getting his sack filled" Chibs took off his glasses and smiled sweetly at Gemma as she looked up from her coffee

"Excuse me?" She asked as if she couldn't believe what she'd just heard

"He's complete himself" Chibs answered softly and chuckled as Gemma looked back to Isla and Jax "Supposed to meet Clay at the shop" Jax nodded

"I'm ready, dump these in my truck?" He bent over to pick up the earlier discarded box just as Chibs came up behind him and took hold of his hips. Isla couldn't help but laugh as Jax jumped away in shock making a strange noise.

"Oh sweet boy, pleasure!" Chibs smirked and took the box

"Remembering breakfast with daddy?"

"Oh yeah, cuppas and oatcakes, delicious." Isla shook her head as Chibs left the room with a spring in his step. Jax sighed and put on his holster before leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to Isla's lips, which surprised her and made Gemma raise her eyebrows at the two of them

"See ya later" Jax' stared directly at his mom for a moment.

"Bye babe" she smiled sweetly and watched him leave. Isla watched the two of them and decided not to say anything, they were acting weird but after a moment of thought Isla wasn't even sure if she wanted to know why.

"You mind waiting here for Neeta? I need to get to the office" Gemma finished off her coffee and put the mug in the sink.

"Actually Neeta isn't coming today. I'm going to meet Luann for some Lunch so I figured I'd just take Abel with me" Gemma stopped and looked back at Isla and shrugged, she trusted her with him.

"Okay... you're a real good mom to him you know" she mumbled with a small smile and picked up her car keys. Isla froze for a moment but Gemma didn't say anything else as she kissed the two of the goodbye and made her way out to her own car, passing Isla's SUV on her way.

SOASOASOASOA

"He's a little cutie huh?" The waitress smiled and nodded to Abel who sat happily in Isla's lap bashing his teddy bear against the table.

"Thanks" Isla smiled as she walked away to make their drinks. Luann watched with a smile forming on her lips.

"What?" Isla laughed and shifted Abel to her other knee.

"You're taking up the role of mommy very well and it suits you" Luann smiled at her niece

"But Lu I'm not trying to—"Her aunt laughed softly and cut her off before she could finish the sentence.

"Isla you might not be trying to be Abel's mother but you are, you look after him more or less every day, you're the one who is there to sooth him when he wakes up in the middle of the night, you're the one who feeds him, hell I'm pretty sure you've even started giving Jax money to cover the rent"

Luann smirked at Isla's sheepish smile, knowing she was right.

"Well I have been spending basically all my time there" she muttered and then straightened up a little bit.

"Rosen called me the other day; I sent away all the evidence needed to get all of mom's stuff released to me. My birth certificate, my ID, her birth and death certificate everything and now it's all been sorted I was thinking about buying a loft or something, maybe open mom's coffee shop again, I'm not really sure" she mumbled and fiddled with a corner of Abel's baby grow, only looking up to meet Luann's gaze when her aunt said nothing in response. She was met with the widest smile and a small and of encouragement

"I think that sounds like a great idea baby, I don't think Em would want that little coffee shop to stay closed, she was so proud of it!" Luann watched as her niece chewed anxiously on her lip and cocked her head to one side "Isla? What is it? What aren't you telling me?" Isla took a deep breath and met her aunt's concerned gaze once more.

"I actually already found a loft that I really like" The anxious look on her face was soon replaced by confusion when her aunt threw back her head and laughed loudly

"Isla baby, why you get yourself so worried? That's good news, I'm glad you've found somewhere so soon, it took me ages to find my dream house." Isla nodded

"But Lu, what about Jax? And Gemma?" Luann frowned and shook her head.

"Baby, you're basically living at Jax' house right now and I can see why." She paused and smiled at Abel who was sat quite happily in Isla's lap not fussing at all. "But it's good for you to have your own escape, somewhere you can go and have a bit of Isla time. I love having you around and I know Gemma does too but baby this is a part of growing up that you missed out on. Everyone needs their own little corner to go and chill out, even though I doubt you'll be spending a lot of time there, it's good to have some kind of retreat." Luann told her firmly and Isla nodded smiling at how much Luann reminded her of Emily.

"Thanks Lu, anyway enough about me how're you?" Isla smiled at the waitress as she came and set their food down in front of the two women. "Jax mentioned you've been having some trouble at the studio?"

Luann sighed softly cursing Jackson Teller under her breath, recognising the worried expression on her niece's face all too well.

"It's nothing baby; the guys are taking care of it. Just some business troubles. Some guy has been giving my girls shit. Georgie Caruso. Thinks he can scare my girls into going to work for him!" Luann grinned at her niece "Let me tell ya Caracara girls do not scare that easily!" Luann smiled uneasily not wanting to tell her niece the full truth knowing it would only worry her.

"Anyway enough, otherwise this food is going to be cold!" the porn queen picked up her fork and dug in.

SOASOASOASOA

"Jesus Christ Jackson, I've been trying to call you all day! Have you heard anything from Isla?"

Gemma stood staring out the office window at Tm, her arms folded across her chest, tapping her pointed boot on the cold floor impatiently.

"What?—Tar hold on a minute okay!" The matriarch heard a familiar voice in the background and felt her irritation building.

"Isla and Abel went out for lunch with Luann, they're fine!"

"And you're just messing around with that little skank, whilst she takes care of your baby?" Gemma shot back venomously

"Ma, not now okay? I've got some stuff to do; I'll speak to you later."

"Sort your fucking priorities out Jackson!" Gemma snarled and flipped her burner shut. For someone who was supposed to be pretty smart her son could sure be stupid. Throwing her phone back on the desk Gemma sat back down at her desk and started to go throw the list of repos trying to take her mind of things.

"Gemma, I think Isla's just pulled up!" Chibs called into the older woman who looked jumped up to go and meet the two of them. Her work wasn't providing a distraction so maybe her grandson would.

"Hello baby! Grandma's missed you!" she laughed and took Abel out of his seat in the back of Isla's SUV.

"He's been fussing in the car the whole way back since lunch. Could probably do with a nap." Isla gave Gemma a quick kiss as she locked the car up behind them.

"Okay sweetheart, I'll give him a cuddle and then put him down in Jax' dorm for a bit. You want a coffee?" Isla nodded appreciatively and chewed her lip as she watched Gemma walk away towards the club house.

"Penny for your thoughts lass?" Chibs smirked over the top of his shades as he took another drag from his cigarette, watching Isla closely.

"Hey beaky." Isla smiled at Chibs and tapped his nose, her own way of telling him he was being nosey. The Scotsman just laughed.

"Come on girl, what's got you in a whir? And don't say nothing!" he grinned as she opened her mouth only to close it again after a few seconds of silence Isla started again.

"Chibs I've been looking at buying a loft or something in town, a studio, just something small."

"Okay? Why's that got you so fidgety?" The look he got from Isla obviously suggested he was crazy.

"What am I supposed to tell Gemma? I know she loves having me around the house when I'm not staying at Jax' and it's not because I don't like being there that I was thinking about it, I just—" Isla wasn't really sure what to say next "I guess I just want somewhere to call my own."

"Then tell her that Isla! Gemma will understand that, hell she left home when she was like 18 and never looked back." Chibs laughed flicking his cigarette he headed towards a minivan that had just been towed into the lot, Isla walking behind him. Neither of them noticing as Tara and Jax pulled into the TM parking lot.

"Don't get yourself in such a tizzy lass! Nothing to worry about!" he grinned as he got in the driver's side, slipping the keys in the ignition he twisted and frowned when nothing happened, trying again the Scot felt his stomach drop when he heard an all too familiar clicking sound.

"SHIT ISLA RUN!" In a panic he pushed the girl away from him with as much force as he could muster and tried to run himself before the force of the exploding car knocked them both off their feet. Isla fell to her knees covering her head with her arms, her ears still ringing with the noise. After a moment she looked up to see every nearby member of the club running towards them. She looked behind her to see Chibs lying on his back, with his eyes closed.

"Chibs?" It seemed to come out in a whisper, she couldn't focus on anything properly the screeching noise in her ears was still so loud.

"CHIBS?!" the blood was pooling faster and faster around is head. Isla literally felt herself go cold, her heart dropped in her chest, he looked so pale and lifeless.

"ISLA? Isla are you okay?" a strong pair of hands were shaking her shoulders and she turned round to meet a pair of bright blue eyes.

"Isla look at me! Are you hurt?" Jax all but screamed at her.

"Jax, I-...no I'm fine. Chibs." He pulled her to his chest in a crushing hug for a moment and kissed her head, not even noticing as Tara watched them.

"I've called an ambulance!" Someone nearby shouted but Isla couldn't pinpoint who, all she could focus on was the blood. There was so much blood.

SOASOASOASOA

"Isla baby? Are you sure you're okay?" Isla watched the ambulance leave the lot before turning round to meet Gemma Teller's dark gaze.

"I'm fine Gem honest." The older woman nodded and gave her a quick hug.

"Gemma?" Isla looked around to make sure there was no one else nearby before focusing her full attention back to the biker queen's curious gaze.

"Was that bomb set by the same people who attacked you?" she whispered and cringed a little bit when the older woman's mouth fell open in shock.

"Isla—I "she paused, her mouth going dry "you remember?" Isla nodded softly "Yeah I remember, I heard what Tara and Unser said, I know what they did to you." She whispered her own icy blue eyes never wavering.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" Gemma asked suddenly finding her voice again and when Isla replied it took every ounce of her composure not to let out the sob she was desperately trying to keep under wraps.

"Wasn't my place to say anything?" She mumbled and was surprised when Gemma pulled her close and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you baby, that means a lot. I don't know who did this, but whoever I was we'll find them!" she promised, wiping the stray tear from her own cheek and for the first time in a while felt herself believing the words that were coming out of her mouth.

The rest of the day passed in a whirlwind for Isla, she followed Gemma and Tig to the hospital where she was again checked over for any concussion or further injuries, gave her statement to Deputy Hale about the explosion and spoke to a frantic Luann on the phone for a good hour before her aunt calmed down. By the time she pulled into Jax' drive way that night she felt exhausted and couldn't wait for the moment her head would hit the pillow.

As she closed the front door ever so quietly behind her, she felt herself being spun round to by Jax, his face only inches away from her.

"I was so scared you were a goner today" he whispered and pulled her into one of his bone crushing hugs.

"Jesus Christ! Jax Can't breathe!" She sighed when he let go of her and smiled softly.

"I promise you, I'm fine. And Chibs should be okay; he's stable now, might have lost a few more brain cells but shouldn't make a massive difference." She giggled softly and with that Jax found his lips crashing into hers. Claiming another stolen kiss from the girl he just couldn't get enough of. When he pulled back he looked down at Isla with a small smirk.

"Good to hear." Leading her back through to the kitchen Jax picked up a thick brown envelope from the kitchen counter. "Listen I gotta run, we got some club business to deal with tonight." Isla searched his face for some kind of answer but finally just nodded with understanding.

"Okay" she whispered "I'll be right here, so come back safe" She smiled and Jax couldn't help but be thankful for her knowing that if he had said those same words to Tara, all hell would have broken loose. It was then he knew that Tara would never ever be able to just accept the club the way Isla did he also knew that if he didn't leave soon then Clay would have his guts for garters.

"Here; I came across these recently, some manuscripts my dad wrote about the club, I think you should see it. Some light bed time reading" he handed Isla the envelope and smirked as she flicked through the thick wad of paper.

" _Light reading_ huh Teller?" rolling her eyes she smacked his chest with the envelope. "Go on get out of here" with one last quick kiss to her forehead Jax grabbed his helmet off the kitchen table and headed out the door.

Isla made herself a cup of chamomile tea and tip toed into Abel's nursery to check on the sleeping boy. She smiled softly at him and couldn't help but feel a little jealous at how blissfully unaware this beautiful baby was at the chaos he was surrounded by. With a small sigh Isla sat down in the rocking chair beside his crib and pulled a thick knitted blanket up around her shoulders, she took a sip of her tea and gently pulled the manuscripts from the envelope before she began to read.

Hours later, the small blonde girl was still sat in the exact same spot, completely lost in what she was reading her tea long forgotten beside her. A small frown etched into her pretty face. She looked up when the sound of her phone buzzing pulled her out of her trance and tiptoed out of the nursery to get it before it woke Abel.

"Gem? Hi! What's up?"

"Oh Isla!" Gemma Teller did not sound her usual calm self. "Baby I'm so sorry to tell you like this, bit Jax and the others have been arrested!"

 ** _A/N: Hey guys! Thank you again for sticking by me through this chapter, I'm sorry if this chapter isn't as interesting as the previous but I promise the next one will be better! Did everyone have a good Christmas/NYE? I certainly did. Just to let you know I have recently started working another Fic which is a Happy/OC fic y'all can thank Eowyn628 and if you haven't already you seriously NEED to head over and read The devil took her breath away it's my all time favourite Happy/OC story._**

 ** _As always please read and review, I look forward to your comments._**

 ** _L xo_**


	14. Chapter 13

**_Chapter 13_**

Isla woke up from her dream with a start and shivered, rolling over she felt around for the comfort of a warm body beside her only to open her eyes and remember Jax wasn't there. He was in prison with the rest of the sons. She lay back for a moment staring at the ceiling.

"I miss you Jax." She whispered just as Abel started to wail in his crib next door. With a sigh Isla threw off the covers and rolled out of her bed, she wondered through to the nursery calling out to Abel as she went.

"I'm coming Abel," she called and pulled open his bedroom door and swooped in to scooping the little boy up in her arms "Here I am baby," she cooed over him "Are you feeling hungry?" she smiled and carried Abel through to the kitchen, sitting him his highchair as she made him a bottle, She held it out to him and giggled when he swatted her hand away wanting to hold his own bottle. "Clever boy" she mused and sat resting her chin on the back of her chair. "Hopefully daddy will be back soon" she whispered and stroked his fluffy little blonde head before standing up and making a beeline for the coffee machine.

"Oh snap out of it Isla, it's not like your husband has gone to fight in the war" she shook her head and turned back to where Abel was sat beside her mobile phone as it started to ring.

"Hello?" Isla grabbed it and turned to grab before Abel got his paws on it. "Gemma? Are you okay?"

"Sweetheart I'm fine!" Gemma Teller answered "I just spoke to Lowen. Bail has been set at 3 million." Isla couldn't help the gasp that escaped her lips "And bond has been set at three hundred thousand."

"Oh my god. Gemma..."

"Baby its okay, I might have a plan, can I swing by and pick Abel up in a bit?" The matriarch asked her, Isla smiled and agreed thinking it would give her some time to go and look at loft space downtown. The two women said their good byes and ended the phone call. Then Isla took a deep breath and stared up at the ceiling for a long moment trying to blink back the tears it could be a while before she saw Jax again, looking back to Abel sat in his high chair blowing bubbles and gurgling happily it made her giggle through her tears.

"I promise I'm not going anywhere little man" Isla smiled softly and lifted him out of his high chair. Deciding there was nothing more she could do Isla got both herself and Abel dressed and ready before she packed his day bag just in time for Gemma to arrive and pick up her grandson.

SOASOASOASOA

"If I could just get a signature here please ma'am!" Isla smiled and nodded, giving a quick scrawl on the delivery guy's clipboard before closing the door and turning round to survey her new loft. After her conversation with Luann at lunch she had gone ahead and put in an offer on the space she had already fallen completely in love with. The seller having already purchased another home and moved out, had all the paperwork ready to go for her within days and handed over the keys pretty sharpish. Now with a sofa in there the place was starting to look a little more habitable. With a deep breath, Isla grabbed the Stanley knife she'd left on the side and started to unpack the boxes she had bought over from Gemma's.

When she'd told the older woman about her plan to move out, she hadn't been too happy about it but had come around in the end. She'd even gone out to buy Isla a whole load of kitchen equipment; cutlery and bedding which Isla knew probably hadn't been cheap. She smiled to herself letting her thoughts drift to the matriarch and her businesslike manner when she'd given Isla the things, although her smile soon faltered as her thoughts drifted to Jax. The son's had been arrested before Isla had gotten the keys to the loft so he was still yet to find out about her moving out of his mother's house. Pushing any thoughts of the blonde biker to the back of her mind the petit blonde busied herself with unpacking and arranging the few belongings she had collected over the last few months before she started on the boxes that Luann had bought over filled with things from Isla and Emily's old house; Childhood photographs and the like. She was thankful her aunt had put so much of their furniture and belongings into storage after her mom had died.

Getting so absorbed in what she was doing Isla completely lost track of time and only realised that most of the afternoon had passed when her cell started to ring and she caught sight of the time before answering.

"Gemma? My god I'm so sorry I didn't realise what time it was. Is Abel okay?" the older woman gave a decidedly uncharacteristic little laugh from the other end of the phone.

"Abel is fine baby. Elliott Oswald just left; he's posting bail for the guys!"

"What?!" Isla couldn't believe what she was hearing, Jax was coming home! After hanging up she hugged herself with glee, unable to control the butterflies in her stomach that had materialised at the prospect of seeing Jax again. Trying to shake her giddiness, Isla rolled her eyes

"Oh girl have you got it bad!" she muttered to herself and grabbed her purse and the leather jacket she had grown so accustomed to before dashing out the door to go and meet Gemma.

SOASOASOASOA

It was late when Jax finally walked up the steps to his front door. As soon as all the Son's had been released, Clay had called church and they'd had to endure what felt like the longest meeting in history that seemed to be getting them nowhere. Finally Clay had called a vote and they'd left things at that. Jax had a few beers with his brother's before leaving to go home, just as the party was really getting started.

Strangely the crow eaters didn't seem to interest him tonight; Jax just wanted to get home and see his son and Isla. He slipped his key into the lock and looked around the empty living room. Seeing how clean and tidy everything looked Jax knew straight away Isla had probably been spending the majority of her time here. The girl was just as much a neat freak as his own mother.

He smiled and crept down the hall to his son's bedroom, peering in; Abel was fast asleep in his crib his little hands holding onto the blanket he had recently grown attached to. Isla fast asleep on the couch, a cup of coffee sat forgotten onto of the unit beside her and the manuscripts Jax had left had fallen beside her on the floor.

Staring at the sleeping girl for a moment Jax couldn't help the urge he felt to wrap her up in his arms. Knowing if he woke her she would insist on sleeping the sofa he shrugged deciding to be selfish. Creeping across the room he lifted Isla gently into his arms and carried her through to his own bedroom being careful not to wake her or his sleeping son. Laying her down Carefully Jax smiled to himself as she curled up in a ball and pulled the covers over herself. He quickly stripped down and got into bed beside her, pulling the covers up even further and turning off his bedside lamp.

"Sweet dreams Iles" he whispered into the darkness and smiled to himself with childish excitement as the girl beside him curled up into his side mumbling in her sleep. He couldn't completely understand what she was saying but he heard her mutter his name and when she did it gave Jax that tight feeling in his chest he had become accustomed to when she was around.

Jax woke up to his cell phone ringing on the nightstand, he looked over to find the other side of the bed empty and frowned for a moment before answering the call. It was Tig, apparently Luann had called saying she'd been robbed and some of the guys were to go and see her. Snapping his burner shut Jax huffed and got up, pulling his jeans and a samcro tee on before grabbing his kutte and heading through to the kitchen where Isla was making coffee with Abel balanced on her hip.

"Morning." He smirked at her only for the blonde to grin back at him and hold out a cup of hot coffee

"Hey, how you doing?" she asked softly, the concern evident in her blue eyes. Jax smiled reassuringly and shook his head, taking the coffee from her

"I'm fine Iles, nothing we can't handle" his cocky smirk almost made her want to throw something at his head. "You finish reading those?" he asked nodding to his father's manuscripts that were piled neatly on the kitchen table.

"Yeah, so is that what you wanna do? You wanna get the club out of running guns?" she asked him with her head cocked to one side. He nodded and watched her for a moment trying to gage what she was thinking. "You really think you can do that?"

Jax sighed and ran a hand through his messy blonde hair

"Yeah Iles I do, it'll take time and blood but change will come." He promised "Anyway I'm gunna have to run, Luann needs us, got robbed or something" he sighed and put his empty coffee cup in the sink "Don't forget my mom is doing dinner at 7 to celebrate us all getting out, so don't be late!" Isla snorted and raised her eyebrows at him. As if she was the one who needed a warning not to be late. As soon as Jax was out the door, she grabbed her cell and went to curl up back under the duvet taking Abel with her and watching as he crawled about in the covers.

"Lu? It's me, are you okay? Jax just said something about you getting robbed!" She was glad when her aunt answered the phone after the third ring.

"Oh honey, I'm fine! It was fucking Georgie! Took my camera and my laptop! I've got so much stuff on there that I need!" her aunt sighed with annoyance

"Well I'm sure the guys will be able to do something for you!" Isla tried to comfort her aunt, knowing how she could get herself into such a panic.

"Mm hmm, speaking of which, nice to have Jax back?" Isla bit her lip for a moment before deciding to spill her beans to the porn queen.

"Yeah, I fell asleep on the sofa in Abel's room last night and when I woke up we were both curled up in the bed and he was cuddling me." There was a pause for a moment before Luann let out a little squeal down the phone.

"Ohhh Jax isn't usually one for cuddling baby, he's more of a fuck you and leave you kind of guy. Must be into you." Isla bit her lip for a moment

"I really like him Lu, I think I might—"she could finish her sentence but her aunt understood

"Honey, you gotta do whatever feels right in your heart, I'm so proud of you Isla, your mom would be too." She could hear the smile in Luann's voice "Baby I gotta go, I think the guys are here, but I'll see you tonight?" Isla agreed and said her goodbyes to her aunt, before focusing all her attention back to the baby rolling about in the duvet in front of her

"What is your daddy doing to me Abel?" she whispered.

SOASOASOASOA

"Jesus Christ it that Tara I can hear?" Lyla asked Isla the two women paused in the hall and listened for a moment at the heated discussion going on between the good doctor and Gemma Teller. Isla sucked in a breath, feeling a strange pang in her chest as she did. Tara was at the family meal? She sighed softly realising Jax had probably seen Tara since he got out.

 _You're not the only girl in his life Iles, better remember that_

She couldn't help but think bitterly

"This could cost me my god damn job!" They could hear Tara.

"Come on, I got your back girl" Isla smiled at Lyla who looked about as nervous as she felt. Lyla was one of her aunt's porn girls who had recently started spending a little bit of time around Opie and his kids, so she was seeing a bit more of her every time she met Luann before lunch and Isla got on well with her, she wasn't a total skank like most of the others. Lyla was a sweet girl just trying to make the best out of her own shitty situation.

"The club is the club, my life is my life. Stay out of it!"

"Hey!" Lyla called a little timidly as the two women stepped into the room. Lyla with her pasta dish, Ellie and Kenny trailing in almost miserably beside her and Isla balancing Abel in one arm and a bowl of salad in the other.

Tara turned her glare on Isla for a moment, her features softening to bewilderment when she spotted Abel nestled against the blonde's hip, or though the cowl soon returned when she caught sight of Lyla.

"Perfect, serving hand jobs for dessert?" Tara turned away with annoyance as Isla could feel Lyla bristle beside her.

"That's real nice in front of the kids!" Lyla glared after her, her blue eyes filling with tears before she slammed her dish down on the table and darted out the room. Gemma and Isla looked at each other with the same with the same irritable expression. Tara was really making Isla's blood begin to boil. What the hell gave her the right to speak to Lyla that way? Lyla might be one of Luann's porn stars but she was still a human with feelings.

"So what you're the nanny now? I guess they don't have to pay you as much as Neeta, not like you could get a job anyway." Even for Tara, the words spilling out of her mouth were harsh.

"Yeah I think it's time you leave." Isla said calmly, perfectly aware of the other old ladies watching her intently from the kitchen.

"Actually, Jax invited me. You on the other hand; I don't know why you're still here, there's plenty of people here to take Abel." She sneered.

Isla couldn't help the small giggle that erupted from her lips. She was furious by now but it still made her chuckle how oblivious this girl was.

"You're right there is, but I'm going to stay and look after Abel until I take him home, put him to bed and then I'll go to sleep in Jax' bed just like I have been for the last week. This is my family, this is where I belong. You? You're just a glorified crow eater with a first aid kit."

Tara's mouth dropped open in shock and she looked around for someone to come to her aid. No one did; they were all too busy watching her get her ass handed to her by a girl who really was considered part of the SAMCRO family. Even Gemma watched with a childish glee none of them noticing as the son's walked through the door behind them.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" Jax asked having witnessed the whole exchange. For a moment Isla thought he was talking to her, until she realised his stormy blue eyes were entirely focused on Tara, who stared right back at him in slight horror.

"Tara was just leaving." Isla was suddenly aware of the words coming out of her own mouth, with one last wide eyed look in her direction Tara grabbed her bag and stormed out the house.

"Come on everybody, let's sit down!" Gemma called out bringing the meat to the table, trying to avoid any uncomfortable questions from her son

"Where the hell were you?" Clay growled to Jax as he, Tig and Happy finally made it to the dinner table

"What you talking about?"

"I got two guys lying in hospital beds and the rest of you decide not to pick of your god damn phones!?" Abel started to grumble in Isla's arms as the club president's voice got louder and louder

"We were neck deep in our pile of shit!" Bobby tried to explain

"Yeah? Well we almost got killed trying to take back our guns man!" Tig snarled right back at him only for bobby to look around with a shake of his head.

"Club business, not here asshole!" With that Tig grabbed him by the front of his kutte and pushed him back viciously. Opie and Half-Sack grabbed the two men almost instantly in an attempt to try and pull them off each other whilst the women look on with forlorn expressions.

"Come on! I mean it!" Finally Happy got in the middle of the two men and was able to break up their little tiff.

"Hey they were helping me Clay!" Opie's deep voice boomed across the room.

"We had some payback to deliver for Caracara!" Jax explained, that caught Isla's attention. What the hell had been going on? Just the deputy Hale walked in through the already open door. What was he doing here? Isla handed Abel over to Quinn's old lady just as he started to really cry

"Well hopefully it went a little better than the Trammel task!" Tig was just full of the sarcastic comments tonight

"Excuse me!" Everyone in the room turned to look at the police deputy. "Sorry to interrupt" The look David Hale gave Isla made her stomach turn. Whatever he was here for was not good.

"I figured I should tell you this in person." He paused as every person in the room quietened down and turned to look at him with piped interest "We just found Luann Delaney off county 18... Beaten to death." With those small three words everything Isla felt she had built up over the last few months came crashing down around her. Her aunt was dead. The only real member of family she had left the only last living reminder of her own mom gone.

The shock on everyone's faces was too much for her, she couldn't hold in the small sob that escaped her and was so lost in trying to hold in the rest she never noticed the comforting arm of another old lady around her.

"We have no other details right now. I'm sorry" he looked directly at Isla and she knew it was sincere but his apologies meant nothing to her, with that he turned and left as the rest of the room tried to collect themselves.

"Did you cause this?" Clay asked his step son quietly and Isla suddenly realised she very much needed to know that answer too.

"What you talking about?" Jax didn't miss a beat

"Payback? Caracara?" Clay Morrow, who had done many awful things over the years suddenly, looked disgusted.

"This was on me Clay." Opie whispered

"Yeah me too" Bobby chimed and Isla could literally feel her heart breaking

"What did you idiots do?" Tig suddenly sounded far away and for a moment Isla thought she was going to pass out.

"I'm not talking to you asshole!" As the men started to fight once more it took everything she had to hold herself up and not crumble, letting her grief consume her.

Gemma Teller looked around at the scene in front of her watching as everything she had worked so hard for started to unravel.

"See what you're doing to this club? Do you see what you're doing to this club?" Her husband roared in her son's face.

"I was risking my ass for this club!" He shouted right back.

"Bullshit!"

"You're as deranged as you are creped!" Jax snarled and turned away from him.

"Now the blind guy's in jail, with no wife, because you just got her killed!" with that Jax spun round and shoved Clay as hard as he could. Isla couldn't take anymore without looking back she turned away and darted through the back door, tearing down the driveway to her SUV she quickly jumped in and drove away from the house as fast as humanly possible. She couldn't stay there. With them. After they had just admitted to getting Luann murdered. She drove and drove until she was too blinded by tears to drive anymore and then she pulled into the private car park realising she had managed to get herself back to the loft before vanishing inside. The second her front door slammed shut Isla collapsed down on the hardwood floor in hysterics, struggling for breath as the tears streamed down her face and she let out great gut-wrenching sobs.

"I'm not the one murdering women!" Back at the house, the whole room stopped dead as Gemma lifted a plate and threw it down with such a force it shattered, spilling food everywhere and Jax realised there were still children in the room, old ladies. Karla stood in the corner of the room holding a now screaming Abel to her chest.

Abel.

Isla.

Jax turned to find the girl who had been standing behind him was now nowhere to be found.

"Isla?" he called out hopefully but she was long gone.

"This is all your fault." Clay snarled before turning and storming away too, Jax couldn't help but wonder.

Maybe it was.

SOASOASOASOA

"Hey mom, it's me." Jax spoke into the burner as he drove his truck to the hospital with Abel in the car seat beside him. Isla had never come back after Gemma's dinner disaster and Jax hadn't heard anything from her, he couldn't help but worry. So after calling her cell and getting no response he tried to think of all the places he might be and deciding he had no time to call Neeta he had loaded Abel up into the car and headed for St Thomas to see if she was visiting Chibs.

"Yeah I'm fine. You heard from Isles at all?" At the other end of the line Gemma let out a long sigh.

"Jax, you gotta leave her alone for a bit baby. She needs time to heal."

"Yeah alright ma, I just wanna know she's alright."

"Jackson, her aunt just died and you might have broken her heart. What the hell do you think?"

"Chibs, I'm in a total shit state." Isla whispered holding on to the Scots hand as silent tears streamed down her face.

"How could they do this? How could Jax do this." She whispered and tried to choke back a sob. Since David had stopped by she had been completely unable to control her emotions. "I think I love him," she sniffed and stared down at her own hands for a moment. "I think I love him but it hurts so much. How can loving someone hurt?" she whispered and looked up to find his eyes wide open and staring at her intently.

"Oh lass." He whispered gruffly and Isla could see the pity clear as day. That made it worse, the pity. Getting up she gave a sorry smile and left the room heading back down the corridor and heading for the parking lot. Only to stop dead and turn back round the corner when she spotted Jax and Abel standing by the main reception talking to none other than Doctor Tara.

Isla bit her lip and held her hands to her chest praying they didn't see her as she tried to think of another route out the building. She couldn't help but listen into their conversation.

"So I'll see you later?"

"Yeah I guess you will Darlin." He leaned over to peck her lips making Tara smile shyly before leaving to finish up her rounds. Jax sighed loudly glancing down at the visitor's book on the side.

Isla-Rose Lawson

There was her neat script plain as day. He spun round on his heel to head towards Chibs room as he noticed there was no signing out time when he caught sight of a familiar blonde slipping out through the front doors.

"Isla!" Jax tried to run after her but by the time he reached the parking lot, she was gone.

 ** _A/N: Eurgh writing Luann's death was so hard! I really did like writing about her! What did you all think of Isla handing Tara her ass? I've been waiting to write that for a while and I really hope I did okay on it. This is my longest chapter yet and I really do hope you all like it. As per; read and review! Hopefully wont take me this long to get another update out again. Been going through some real personal shit lately so have been struggling to get anything done. Hopefully though I'll be back to more frequent reviews asap. xo_**


	15. Chapter 14

**_Chapter 14_**

Jax sat on the top of a picnic bench outside the clubhouse with a cigarette in one hand and his burner in the other, staring down at the name and number on the screen.

He hadn't seen or heard from Isla in almost two weeks and although he couldn't really blame the girl he certainly couldn't deny that he didn't miss her and after everything that had happened over the last few weeks between him and Clay he couldn't help but find himself wishing he could talk to her about it all and having not seen Isla for a while; Jax had resorted to spending some of his free time with Tara although he found he couldn't talk to her the way he could to Isla, especially not about club business.

"Church in ten!" Clay shouted from somewhere inside the clubhouse and Jax sighed. This was it. The club were voting on his decision to go nomad and suddenly he wondered what she would think of him. Taking one last puff on his fag before stubbing it out Jax hit the call button and pressed the prepay to his ear.

"Please pick up Iles"

On the edge of town in the old cemetery Isla was sat beneath the willow tree that grew beside her mother's and now her aunt's grave. The sun was streaming through the gaps in the trees and it was such a beautiful day but she couldn't care less. With tears glistening on her porcelain cheeks, she stared at the two head stones in front of her whilst twisting the charm bracelet her aunt had given her for Christmas in her hands.

"I'm so so sorry" she whispered as the sob she had been trying so hard to hold in escaped her lips "I miss you both so much." When her phone started to ring in her pocket, Isla pulled it out and barely even glanced at the name before throwing it down in the grass beside her. She'd been avoiding Jax for two weeks now and planned to keep it that way for a little while longer. Although she'd spoken to Gemma and Chibs without really knowing what had happened and whether Jax really was responsible for her aunt's murder it still hurt to even be around him. So she'd spent two weeks holed up in her loft, only really leaving to make quick trips to the shop or slip in to the hospital to visit Chibs when she was sure Tara wasn't there.

Gemma had come over to see her almost every day, bringing Abel with her just to put a small smile back on Isla's face. It broke the older woman's heart to see Isla this way but she knew there was nothing she could do except watch, she had thought Isla might be getting better the last time they had seen each other she seemed slightly more cheerful even if Isla didn't feel it herself.

"Damn it Isla, call me back!" Jax knew the frustration was evident in his voice as he left yet another voice mail for her. He sighed, his voice a little softer when he admittedly honestly; "I miss you, so please call me." Then he hung up and shoved the burner back in his kutte before heading in to church.

"We know what's on the table" Clay started as the final club member sat down and the door was closed "Nomad charter accepted Jax. Redwood has to vote to release." Jax look around at the other men sat at the table, most of which were staring at the wood avoiding his gaze.

"You wanna say anything?" Clay asked and Jax could help but feel bitter, now he could suddenly find his manners, he just narrowed his eyes and shook his head. Everyone knew the deal

"This is the best thing for SAMCRO." Clay sighed as if it was a difficult decision before raising his hand.

"Yay. I got Tig's proxy. It's a yay." Jax looked up

"Yay." He murmured without missing a beat and looked to Bobby who shook his head sadly.

"Juice's proxy's a yay. Me..." he looked round to meet Jax' gaze "yay." At the other end of the table Piney stood up and gave Jax such a glare that for a moment he wondered if the old man would say no. Then came the quite "yay" followed by a death glare before he moved aside and left the room.

"Yay." Opie didn't even look up to meet Jax' eyes, felling betrayed by his best friend.

"Chibs" Clay prompted after a few moments of silence from the Scot.

"This what you want Jackie boy? For real?" Jax chewed on his slip for a second before nodding. This was the best thing for them all. "Jesus." Chibs looked at the ceiling for a moment his eyes looking slightly damp before sitting back, "Yay."

"Unanimous." Clay declared before pounding his gavel quickly and turning his back to Jax "You're free to transfer"

"I'll let Quinn know" He didn't waste any time in pulling off his kutte, taking out his knife and cutting the redwood original tags away from the leather before turning on his heel and walking away.

When he stepped out into the darkness of the parking lot, Jax couldn't help but feel slightly surprised to find Tara standing outside leaning against her cutlass.

"You okay?" she asked softly cupping his face in her hands, Jax looked down seeing blue eyes for a split second instead of the green ones that were actually staring up at him, then he sighed and just nodded as Tara looked down at his kutte noticing the empty space on his chest.

"I have some vacation time coming; let's just get away for a few days. Big Sur, the desert, I don't care."

"What about the kid?" and Isla? He didn't say the last part aloud but Jax didn't really like the idea of just leaving town with Abel when he was fairly sure that Isla had still been seeing him almost daily even if she had been ignoring Jax.

"Take him with us. Let's just go, tonight." Jax frowned he wasn't very keen on this new idea but with if Isla wasn't speaking to him and didn't want to see him there what was the issue?

"Okay." He answered in a way that dismissed the idea more than agreed with it, out the corner of his eye he noticed his mother walking up behind Tara, glaring daggers at her as she did.

"I need to talk to you" Gemma Teller practically stepped in the middle of the two of them, forcing them apart.

"It's done mom." Jax didn't have the energy for this fight again.

"Meet me at my house. Both of you." Jax looked surprised but nodded anyway.

As Gemma walked away and disappeared inside the club house Tara couldn't help the irritation she suddenly felt. She knew what it was about; Gemma was choosing now to tell Jax and Clay about her attack. She gritted her teeth as the realisation dawned on her; there was no way Jax would leave Charming when she told her story. He'd stay, with his son, his mother and her. She hadn't seen Isla since the meal at Gemma's and that was just the way Tara liked it. Without her skinny blonde ass around she'd had the perfect opportunity to spend some time with Jax although the doctor was almost certain he was still pining over Isla. There had been a few times when they were together when she had caught Jax making phone calls and as soon as she walked into the room he'd put his phone away and claim it was club business. Didn't concern her and yet when she had gone through his phone records the last time he was in the shower there was one name that popped up more than anyone's.

Isles.

SOASOASOASOA

Jax lay in bed staring at Tara's bedroom ceiling. Pushing himself up on his elbows he glanced over the top of the sleeping Tara beside him at the alarm on the night stand; realising it was almost 2am Jax flopped back and sighed, playing over everything that had happened that evening in his head.

After meeting Tara outside the clubhouse, the two of them had headed over to Gemma's house as his mom had asked and sat down. Then when Gemma and Clay arrived they had all sat down at the table and the Biker queen told them what had really happened the night of Bobby's party how her and Isla had left together only to be attacked by a young girl and her male accomplice. How they had knocked the two of them out, leaving Isla on the roadside before taking Gemma away to an abandoned warehouse.

Nothing Jax had ever felt before compared to the anger he felt towards the people who had done this to Gemma and Isla and every time he thought he was getting it under wraps and calming down he would close his eyes and see Isla's smiling face behind his eyelids again and it would all come flooding back.

Finally Jax had had enough, he quietly got out of bed and pulled on some clothes and slipped out the door barely even glancing back at Tara as he left. Leaving the house, Jax got on his bike and drove through the dark and quiet streets letting the passing wind blow away all his thoughts until he finally stopped at Charming cemetery.

 _Coming to see you pop._ Jax thought to himself and shut off his bike before heading into the graveyard, towards John Teller's grave. Walking through the cemetery, Jax found it strangely peaceful, watching the tree branches move in the wind he paused as the drooping branches of an old willow tree fluttered in the breeze to reveal a young woman sat beneath them with her back to Jax.

"Isla?" he stopped dead for a moment watching her, waiting to see if she would turn round so he could make sure it was definitely her. As he watched, Isla shifted her weight and ran her hands through her messy blonde curls just as Jax had seen her do a million times before. With that little conformation he strode forwards, being careful not to make too much noise in case she realised he was there and left without saying anything to him.

"Isla?" Jax murmured only when he was almost close enough to touch her. She spun round so fast anyone would have thought she had just spotted something poisonous in the grass beside her. When Jax saw her face staring up at him, wide eyed and tear stained it almost broke his half in two.

"Isla. I'm so so sorry" he whispered and eventually when she said nothing in response and he couldn't help himself; Jax pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her slender little frame. "Iles, please please forgive me?" As her scent enveloped him Jax could feel some the ball of anxiety in his stomach slowly start to untwist although something else reached his nostrils as well.

"Jax, I think you better go" finally she found her voice and although it was quiet Isla was proud that she didn't stutter at least she thought she didn't but to him she sounded odd, slightly slurred. Her arms stayed perfectly still at her sides not moving even when Jax hugged her close. He took a step back and looked down at her his confusion written clearly across his face.

"No Isla. I'm not going anywhere" Jax stared down at her only for Isla to purse her lips before turning round only to wobble slightly. "Wow, Iles!" He caught hold of her before she hit the floor, then he noticed the empty bottle of jack on the floor a few foot away from where they stood.

"Isles are you drunk?" Jax frowned suddenly pinpointing what the odd smell was; Isla stunk of booze. "Come on, let's get you home." Jax sighed and hooked an arm around her waist only for her to try and side step him only to fail miserably and almost fall over again.

"No, leave me alone!" She moaned at him and tried to pull away again.

"Jesus Christ Isla, come on!" He huffed again and caught her wrist pulling her closer so she couldn't get away from him "If you stay here you'll freeze, I'm taking you home"

"Oh please, you don't even know where I live." Isla couldn't help but smirk with self satisfaction when Jax stared down at her with surprise.

"Are-Are you living at Luann's?" Jax asked softly only for Isla to wrench away from him looking as though he had just slapped her.

"No Jax I don't, so why don't you run on home to everyone's favourite doctor." She hissed and spun on her heel, stalking off towards the cemetery exit. Running his hand through his hair, Jackson Teller stared after the fiery blonde, fighting an internal battle.

He understood her fury towards him seeing as it was all his fault that she had no real family left except the club but on the other hand he couldn't lose her again, the last few weeks without her had been a real struggle for him and as selfish as he knew it was; Jax didn't want to lose her again, so he turned round and trudged after.

Jax kept his distance from Isla as they walked through the dark streets of Charming but she still knew he was there making sure she got home safe. She could hear the soft thud of his sneakers against the cold concrete, hear the fizzle of his cigarette and feel his blue eyes boring into the back of her head.

"If you're going to stalk me home, you might as well get up here and talk to me." Isla glared over her shoulder before turning back and staring straight ahead to hide the smile on her face as Jax snickered and jogged up beside her. The pair walked in silence for a few moments, him trying to find a way to tell her how sorry he was for everything that had happened over the last few weeks and her trying to find a way to tell him how she'd felt without him.

"Iles –"

"Jax—"she stopped and turned to him, meeting his curious blue eyed gaze "You go first."

"Okay. I'm Sorry Isla. I'm so sorry about everything that's happened, I'm sorry about what happened to Luann." She stared at him for a moment before giving a small nod.

"Thank you." It was still too raw for her to talk about her aunts death, she missed her so much "How's Abel?" she whispered trying her best to blink back the tears that were suddenly threatening to spill down her cheeks.

"He's doing okay, he's very restless though, cries a lot. Ma says it's because he's teething again." Jax chewed his lip for a moment "Iles? When you coming home? Abel misses you, so do I" Isla looked up at him, her confusion evident on her face.

"Jax, I don't know. I'll think about it. Anyway this is me." She paused outside a beautiful Victorian style door just off the street.

"Come on then, you gunna show me your new pad?" Jax flashed one of his signature smirks, only earning himself an eye roll from Isla

"Come on then you jerk, fifteen minutes and then I'm kicking you out." Jax stood back and crossed his heart before following her through the door and up the stairs into the loft that looked out across the Charming town.

 ** _A/N: I am so so sooo incredibly sorry it's taken me so long to get this chapter out, I've recently had a promotion at work and decided to write my own teenage fiction book so I haven't had a lot of time. Also I know this chapter isn't mega interesting and probably seems a little rushed as I was conscious of the fact I haven't updated in so long, so I apologise for that too but I promise the next chapter book will be much more interesting. As usual; please read and review! I love getting all your thoughts on this story. I'm even getting annoyed with Jax's yo-yoing between Isla and Tara but I promise there is an end game haha!_**

 ** _Laters lovelies_**

 ** _L xo_**


	16. Chapter 15

**_Chapter 15_**

"You're dreaming again Iles, go back to sleep" Jax whispered as Isla began to murmur in her sleep again.

"Hmm Jax?" He looked down at the girl sleeping and smiled softly

"Yeah I'm still here, go back to sleep" it was incredibly early and the sun had only just started to rise over the sleepy little town; no one needed to be awake for hours.

"Jax, I love you." The whisper was so quiet he almost didn't know if he'd imagined it but as they lay there together, a jungle of limbs, bed sheets and golden hair. As he watched her the realisation hit him; Jackson Teller had always known the sun was a kind of star but he had never put much thought into that before; this girl who'd just happened into his life, now sleeping at his side, face bathed in the sunlight. The golden beams were radiating all around her. For a moment his heart stuttered and his eyes widened. Isla was his star, his sun and now he had to figure out what he was going to do with this information.

"I love you too darlin" he whispered and fiddled nervously with a strand of her hair suddenly very awake and unable to get back to sleep

 _SOASOASOASOA_

The sharp buzz of his burner bought Jax out of his thoughts a few hours later and he lunged for it before it woke Isla, seeing the number on the screen he flipped it open

"Ma? What's up?"

"Jackson where are you? You should be here by now!" Gemma was stern with her son.

"It's okay, I'm with Isla."

"Oh. We'll bring her with you and get here soon." He could hear the smile in her voice, flipping the phone shut he looked down to see wide blue eyes staring up at him.

"Hello."

"Hey," he grinned , wondering briefly what he was supposed to say next "sorry, didn't mean to wake you"

"Nah it's okay, I'm ready to get up!" He watched as she sprung out of bed and pulled open the blinds

"Listen Iles about last night.."

"Jax, don't. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said what I said, it's not Tara's fault." His heart sank, the look on Isla's face said it all; she didn't remember those three little words. "Earth to Jax?" He was abruptly pulled back out of his thoughts

"Sorry Iles, not its fine, I'm sorry for everything. Gemma told us all the truth last night; about her being..raped"

"Oh" Isla fiddled nervously with her duvet

"And then everything with Luann—"

"Jax, stop." Isla shook her head, she still didn't feel ready to talk about her aunts death. "Judging by that phone call you're wanted so maybe you should get going" As she sat back against her pillows, Jackson Teller stared down at the blonde who was doing so well at driving him crazy and ran his hands through his own shaggy blonde hair.

"I don't wanna leave if it means I'm not going to see you again for weeks..I miss you, Abel misses you." Isla peeked up at him through her dark eyelashes and snickered

"You're pathetic Teller, I've been seeing plenty of Abel so just admit you miss me and get on with it." Jax laughed

"Alright Blondie, you got me. I miss you" there was a pause before She flashed a brilliant smile and threw the covers off herself, swinging her toned legs over the side of the bed.

"Okaaaaaay, well I suppose I can spare some time for you today."

"Oh you're so kind, but seriously Iles," he caught ahold of her arm as she walked past him to the bathroom and pulled her back to him "are we okay?"

Isla looked up at him for a moment before nodding "Yes Jax, we're okay."she smiled softly at him and handed him the white t-shirt at her feet.

 _SOASOASOASOA_

When Jax and Isla pulled into the compound And Isla noticed how full the car park was, she started to get suspicious

"Jax what the hell is going on here—?" Then she spotted Gemma and one of the other woman carrying huge bags of shopping from the SUV towards the clubhouse.

"Oh my god! Lock down?!" She peered round at him wondering what the hell she could have possibly missed in little under two weeks that could have caused this.

Jax had the good grace to at least look a little sheepish under her glare "Look Iles, I wasn't entirely sure if you'd come if I told you the truth. There's just something we gotta deal with then everything we be okay!"

Walking into the club house; Isla didn't think she'd ever seen so many people there when there wasn't a party going on, men in kuttes, women and children were milling around, even Unser sat quietly in the corner. She smiled when Gemma came over to them with Abel in her arms and took the gurgling baby happily. Suddenly a loud whistle pierced the room

"Everybody, listen up!" Tig Trager shouted out holding his palms up to the room, the music quietened and every person in the room turned to face Clay as he began to speak

"I wanna welcome you all to club reaper, glad you made your reservations early cos as you can see we are booked to capacity." He paused as a small chuckle went round the room "You're here because you're family and because SAMCRO takes care of its own. Next couple of days; this clubs got some business to handle that could put our members and the people connected to us in unfriendly situations ."Isla looked down at the little boy in her arms who was happily tugging on one of her loose blonde curls and felt as though her heart was being constricted. Nothing could happen to this little boy

"Now chances are nothing is gunna happen" Clay continued as the whole room gave him their full attention "but people have already been hurt on my watch and that ain't ever gunna happen again. Nobody gets in, nobody leaves without an escort, you got a safety concern you talk to Piney" he looked round to the older man who raised his gun in the air " you got a comfort concern you talk to my queen" he looked over to Gemma who gave a small nod "under his roof you'll all be safe, you should make yourself at home, I love all of ya" a cheer went up round the room and Isla couldn't help but feel that she really was back where she belonged.

"Jesus Christ, what is that bitch doing here?" Isla followed Gemma's glare to see Tara standing awkwardly by the club house door, trying to make herself look as small possible.

" come on ma, we need a doctor" Jax growler warning his mother not to start some shit now, isla couldn't help but grin up at Gemma thinking this argument was far from over but a few hours later stood corrected as she found herself standing beside Gemma watching as Tara tended to a man she didn't recognise whose hands were covered in horrible burns

"You need to put ointment on these burns every few hours otherwise you run a pretty high risk of infection." The good doctor didn't even flinch and Isla had to admit she respected that as every one else in the room looked on in a combination of curiosity, disgust and horror.

"Man you must of really pissed somebody off" Gemma spoke up voicing everyone's thoughts

"My personality is such that there is no middle ground" The clubhouse door swung open for Clay and Jax to make their way inside "People either love me or loath me"

"Jesus Christ you just won't die" Clay called out, setting his eyes on the man.

Obviously deciding she couldn't watch anymore Gemma got up and put her hand on Isla's arm

"Come on baby lets go run some errands, doc you might as well come with us."

"You take somebody!" Clay wanted as Jax gave Isla a hug

"Stay safe Isles" he whispered and gave Tara a smile as she passed by him

Gemma noticed the exchange and couldn't help but look a little smug at how her son seemed to be giving his attention to the right girl at last.

 _SOASOASOASOA_

It had been less than 24 hours since AJ Weston, Ethan and Polly Zoebelle had been arrested and put into police custody and Isla was hoping it wouldn't be much longer until they finally found out what was going on. She stood outside Charming PD, leaning against Jax and making polite conversation with Tara and Lyla whilst Gemma sat in the shade with Clay stealing her glances every now and then. Tig was sprawled out on another bench whilst Bobby, Juice, Chibbs and the prospect enjoyed the sun. There was a short whistle and then chief Unser appeared and everyone was suddenly a lot more alert.

"What?" Clay asked, getting straight to the point

"Stahl has been locked in a room with FBI for two hours now, no idea what's going on" he looked round the group

"What about Weston?" Jax growled, he still wanted revenge for his mother.

"Still waiting to hear from the DA…Sorry" Unser shrugged before retreating back inside the station, there was a collective sigh of disappointment round the group as everyone resumed their previous posts

"You should get going back to the clubhouse, gunna need you there" Clay told his wife who nodded and gave him a kiss

"Come home to me" Isla heard the matriarch murmur And couldn't help but feel uneasy about the whole situation. Having sat down and had a proper talk with Jax the night before she knew ATF were hot on the clubs backs trying to build their case against the Irish and the club desperately needed to eliminate the Zobelles and AJ Weston but something about the whole situation really wasn't sitting right with Isla and she couldn't shake the feeling something really really bad was going to happen.

"Sack, stay with my mom, Isla and Tara" Jax turned to the prospect

"Absolutely"

"You alright Isles?"Jax turned his blue eyed gaze on her and Isla sighed patting his cheek affectionately.

"Yeah." She was aware Tara was watching their whole exchange but at this moment in time she really could not give a shit about saving anyone's feeling so she gave Jax a quick kiss on the cheek and followed Gemma down to the SUV with Tara traipsing a little awkwardly along behind her.

 _SOASOASOASOA_

"Abel sit still for Tara please!" Isla giggled as the doctor struggled to get the little boy strapped into his car seat.

"Got it!" Both women couldn't help but chuckle as Abel tried to wriggle free again only to find he was strapped securely in now. Having picked up all the extra groceries they were just about to head back the club house when Gemma came out the store and took the keys from Isla,

"I'm driving!" She announced

"Okay,"the blonde bit her lip anxiously as she clambered into the passenger seat. Facing forward to see Polly Zoebelle loading up her car ahead of them Isla froze.

"That woman, that's the one who attacked us… where are we going?"

"Forward sweetheart" the older woman as she confidently pulled out into the stream of traffic just behind the impeccable smokes car.

When they finally pulled into a side road where Polly turned off, with half sack following behind them Isla started to panic slightly.

"What are we doing here Gemma?" Tara called from the back seat but Gemma just ignored her and pulled into a parking space suddenly realising what was going to happen Tara started to talk

"That rape would have destroyed most women but it made you stronger, wiser, compassionate and whatever it is you think you have to do, you're past it." Isla couldn't fault her for trying but secretly she believed they all knew deep down there was going to be no talking Gemma down so she started to hatch a plan of how they could get them all out of there and fast.

"My son, my husband, their brothers are out there risking their lives, their freedom for me, this is how I do my part, God's put her in my path so I can fix that part of me that they ripped open. I'm supposed to do this."

"Jesus.. do you even hear what you're saying?"Tara looked on at the older woman with deep concern

"Isla, get my grandson home safe, love you sweetheart"

"Gemma please just think for a second.." Isla started to say putting her hand on Gemma's arm to pull her back

"I'll be okay" Gemma promised but Isla wasn't having it.

"No, listen here's what we're gunna do. Jax' house is five minutes away from here, let me just drop Abel and Tara over there and then I'll come straight back for you. Take five, have a smoke and just wait for me to come back! Please? Then we'll deal with this together" She begged, the older woman hesitated for a moment and then nodded

"Okay, fair enough." She got out the car and sat on the curb pulling out her packet of smokes and lit one up.

Isla watched her for a moment and then got out the car heading round the back.

"Stay here and keep an eye on her" she told the prospect firmly " don't let her do anything stupid, I'll be ten minutes tops." Then she jumped back in the drivers side of the car and headed off

The second the SUV was out of sight Gemma threw down her unfinished cigarette and got up, heading toward the house Polly Zoebelle had just disappeared inside of, ignoring the protests of Half sack from behind her who watched helplessly.

"Oh shit" when a few cop cars pulled up in a matter of minutes, kip knew something was horribly wrong so he jumped on his bike and headed back towards the house for help, already knowing his ass was toast.

Isla has just pulled out into traffic when she saw the prospect speed past her in the other direction.

"God Damn it"she cussed under her breath and pulled into a side road a little further up to turn round and head back to Jax' again. What the hell was going on?! Whatever it was, she was not expecting the sight before her when she reached the house again. Half Sack was lying still on the kitchen floor, his top soaked in blood from a wound to his stomach, following the sound of sobbing Isla found Tara strapped into the rocking chair in Abel's room, looking round and realising there was no sign of the baby, pure terror filled her body.

She ripped the tape of Tara's mouth

"Tara where's Abel?!"

"The Irish man I patched up; he took him" Isla barely heard the last words as she ran out the house again looking around wildly, she must have been only minutes too late. Down the end of the road she could see the telltale flash of silver that was Cammy Hayes driving away, she jumped in her own car and gave chase, dodging through the traffic and over taking she was suddenly thankful of all the ridiculous driving tips Jax had given her. As she drove she noticed in her rear view mirror the flash of bikes as Jax, Chibs And Opie started to gain on her. Speeding down the high way Isla had her foot on the floor trying as hard as she could to catch up with the Irishman and when she reached the docks she didn't stop to turn off the engine she simply flung the door open and ran as fast as her legs would carry her after the Irish man just ahead of her, behind her Jax jumped the railings and the others followed quickly behind. He caught up with her just as she reached the end of the jetty and Cameron Hayes sped out of the wharf with Abel on the boat.

The sound that came from Isla's mouth; she didn't even know she could make. She fell to her knees and Jax fell down beside her, Clay wrapped his arms around his stepson whilst Chibs held onto Isla as she sobbed, watching helplessly as her baby was taken away from her

"He took my son! HE TOOK MY SON!" Jax shouted in disbelief, tears streaming down his own face and then he let out the most primal scream as the rest of the club surrounded them feeling equally as helpless.

 ** _A/N: I am sooo sorry, I can't believe it's been over a year since I updated this story. I'm a terrible person I know, I'm also aware this chapter may not be particularly interesting as it follows the show quite closely but I promise you I've got some good stuff coming up, however I don't plan on following the show as closely now, in fact I'm probably going to tweak the storyline a bit or even deviate from it entirely, we shall see. if I still have anyone following the story please know I appreciate your patience so much, I hope you can forgive me for my lack of writing and I hope you enjoy this chapter. will hopefully have another update for both this story and my other one very very soon_**


	17. Chapter 16

_**A/N: apologies guys! I did upload this chapter and then changed my mind and made a few changes, ending is slightly different**_

 _ **Chapter 16**_

3 days had gone past and not a sniff of new information on Abel's whereabouts. Isla sat on sofa in Abel's bedroom with a cup of coffee in her hand with Jax sat across from her on the floor with his back against the crib, a bottle of jack in his hand. That was how they had lived for the last 3 days, in the beginning Isla had cried and Jax and held her, now she had run out of tears and just sat there; her skin felt tight and her eyes were puffy. Her throat was dry and her head was banging as if it were about to explode but inside she felt totally numb. After the time spent around Gemma and the club Isla had started to think that she was getting stronger, than she could cope with what life was going to throw her way and now this; Abel being taken; it felt as though her entire world had crashed down around her and was burning.

Suddenly realising that her cup of coffee had gone cold hours ago she stood up and picked up the empty whisky bottle from beside Jax.

"More?" Her voice was hoarse from saying nothing in the last few days. He just nodded, so Isla stumbled through to the kitchen for the coffee and the whiskey. When she returned she sat down beside him and stared at the two drinks in her hands for a moment before handing the coffee to him and cracking the top of the whiskey for herself. She looked down at the half smoked cigarette Jax was clutching and without really thinking about what she was doing she took it off him and took a deep drag before exhaling.

It tasted disgusting and made Isla want to cough her guts up but it gave her the tiniest little distraction for a brief second so she took another drag followed by a gulp of whiskey.

Jackson Teller looked down at her for a moment with a dead look on his face before he took a swig of the coffee and lit up another cigarette. Neither of them noticed Doctor Tara Knowles standing in the door way. She had slept on the sofa for the last few days and tried to make Jax and Isla food when she didn't have to go to work but she always came back to find it untouched, she wasn't even sure if the two noticed her being around the house.

A knock at the door grabbed Tara's attention before Clay, Opie and Chibs all appeared.

"I don't know what to do, they haven't moved for days." Tara whispered as they all peered into the nursery and stared at the pair wrapped in each other's arms with their grief.

"It's half-sack's funeral today. We gotta get those two up."

Between them all they managed to get Isla and Jax both into the bathroom where it seemed as though Isla regained consciousness, she stared at the shower for a moment that had been turned on and started to strip off the vest and jeans she had been living in before she clambered into the shower, like a zombie Jax followed suit and eventually the two of them were starting to look semi-presentable.

Stepping out the shower Isla wrapped herself up in a towel and sat on the closed lid of the toilet, she watched Jax as he feebly attempted to rinse the soap of himself and thought about how the way he looked perfectly described how she felt; dead inside. The light from his eyes had gone and dark shadows had appeared under his eyes. Suddenly something inside Isla snapped

"Jax?" He looked round at her "we have to pull our shit together" she whispered looking down at her hands as the tears pooled in her eyes "I want Abel back, more than anything" With a sigh Jax got out the shower, wrapped a towel round his waist and pulled her close, crushing her slender frame against him as Isla sobbed into his chest "We can't just sit around waiting anymore, we have to do something!" She hiccuped causing him to look down at her for a moment.

"You're right Isles.. as usual" He croaked giving her a weak smile "come on Darlin"

"Can you ride?" Clay asked when the two of them stepped out from the bedroom, clothed and ready. Jax nodded

"Give me a minute" he muttered noticing Tara standing in the doorway of Abel's room, then he kissed Isla's head and pushed her gently to the door letting her leave the house with Clay before he turned his attention back to Tara

"I think you blame me" Tara almost whispered finally building up the courage to look Jax in the eye, he clenched his jaw and sighed loudly

"This has nothing to do with you, none of it does."

"None of it?" Tara repeated in an almost sarcastic tone

"I'm sorry this happened, I should never have involved you in this club again. I didn't think it through, obviously I do that; I don't think things through but now I have and…" Jax paused as he tried to find the right words he knew there was no right way to say this but he had to be honest and do the right thing for once.

"Tara you don't belong here, you should have gone back to Chicago. There's nothing here for you in Charming." The brunette stared at him in a stunned silence, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to grasp what he was saying.

"But Jax, you're here and Abel…"

"Abel isn't your son Tara and we're not together anymore. There's nothing here for you."

"So you're telling me there's nothing between us anymore? You feel absolutely nothing for me?"

Jax ran a hand through his hair, time to face up to his responsibilities

"I know I haven't handled our situation in the best way but this has to be the end."

"But Jax, you don't expect me to just—"

"Tara it's simple, I have my family and all I want. You don't belong here."Then he walked away, not even looking back. Once again Jax knew that he had not handled the situation in the best way, he didn't have a way with wording his emotions the way Isla did but he didn't care anymore. All he wanted was his family back.

 _SOASOASOASOA_

Although Isla had known a lot of people would show up for Half-Sack's funeral, she had not expected this, she took a deep breath as her and Jax climbed the steps up to the funeral home and walked through the crowd of people to the small room where a glossy black coffin stood with a picture of Sack in his Veteran uniform.

"You alright Darlin?"

"I will be, we will be" she murmured and stared at the coffin for a moment before doing something she had never done in her life.

Isla got down on her knees and said a prayer over the prospects coffin. She prayed that Kip's soul may rest and finally know peace, she prayed that all the shit with ATF would blow over, That Gemma could come home and she prayed that they would find Abel safe and he would be back in her arms soon. So lost in her thoughts Isla didn't notice for a moment that Jax was stroking her hair but when she did, stood up to find Clay standing to her left. Offering up a watery smile Isla stepped into his outstretched arms to return the quick hug before standing back, sensing the men needed to talk she decided to head out into the cool night air with Lyla and Opie.

"I think we've had enough funerals to last more than one lifetime" she turned round as Jax, Clay and a few of the others left the building walking down the steps, the arm of the blonde biker wrapped around her shoulders pulling her in close and Isla inhaled the smell of cigarettes and leather. This was where she felt safe. The sound of a van could be heard speeding down the street, the scratching of metal on metal as the door was opened and then the open fire of machine guns.

"SHIT!" Jackson grabbed Isla and pushed her down into the grass, covering her body with his. It seemed as though the world was slowing down around Isla, screams and gun shots rang in her ears.

After what seemed like an eternity Jax rolled over and got up, pulling up the blonde from beneath him. He looked around, surveying the damage, Chucky's white shirt was soaking up blood from his arm, David Hale's lifeless form lying in the middle of the road, a screaming mother holding her blood sodden child in her arms and one of the shooters lying face down in the road surrounded by a few of Unser's officers.

Isla watched frozen as Jax sprinted down to the road, and grabbed the shooter by the shoulders slamming his face repeatedly into the cold hard ground.

When would this hell on earth end?

 _SOASOASOASOA_

As Jax trudged up the steps to his front door he was surprised to see light shining from the hall, it was so late he had just assumed Isla would be fast asleep by now. Since his kidnapping both he and Isla had spent every spare moment they could together and it just confirmed how he felt about her.

"Isles?" He called out, kicking the front door shut behind him. Walking through the hall he froze upon reaching the door to Abel's nursery. The room looked as though a bomb had gone off, the shelving had been ripped down from the unit and there were nappies and baby lotions strewn all across the room.

"Aw shit," he murmured as the realisation hit him.

"Have you been home today?" Isla looked round at him from the middle of the room holding a handful of cuddly toys to her chest.

"Not since I told Tara to get out of here" he muttered causing Isla to drop the teddies in shock

"What do you mean?"

Jax ran a hand through his hair a little awkwardly, it was now or never;

"I told Tara she should have gone back to Chicago cos I don't need her here" Isla's mouth dropped open with surprise "Isla do you remember when I came over to your loft? What you said to me?"

She cocked her pretty blonde head to one side, a small crease appearing on her forehead

"About what?" That just confirmed it.

"You told me to loved me" Isla's face paled a little "did you mean that?"

"Jax..I thought I dreamed that.." she whispered shakily and Jax thought his heart couldn't possibly break anymore, he turned to leave when Isla called out to him

"Jax wait, I'm not saying I didn't mean it!" He turned back to her in amazement.

"You love me?" She took a deep breath and nodded

"Yes" the whisper was so quiet Jax almost didn't hear it but it was definitely there. In an easy stride he crossed the room and pulled Isla into his arms, crushing his lips against hers. He'd never kissed lips so soft.

"I love you too" The way Isla's entire face lit up; in that moment she really did look like an angel, giving a funny little yelp of joy she flung her arms round his neck and kissed him again.

Leaving the nursery half sorted the two of them went through to the bedroom, a mess of limbs and blonde hair they became well acquainted between the sheets. Jax couldn't decide what turned him on more, the quiet mewling noises Isla made whilst his hand explored her body or the way she nipped his lower lip with her teeth between her desperate kisses.

"Oh god Jax, please don't stop!" She breathed as he teased her, Jax hid his smirk as he kissed her neck. Before he knew it Isla was pushing down his boxers and wrapping her legs around him.

"You're going to be the death of me Isles" he whispered and gently pushed inside her.

"Don't ever go anywhere okay?" Isla mumbled sleepily as Jax held her close to his chest, he smiled and kissed her forehead

"Doesn't matter where I go, I'll always be yours." She giggled and nodded absent-mindedly tracing an invisible pattern across his ribs.

"Got some intel that the Irish man is in Vancouver" that grabbed her attention. Isla rolled over and sat up slightly, resting on her elbows.

"Really? What're you going to do?" Jax shifted onto his side to look at her, fiddling with one of the curls hanging over her shoulder as he debated on how much Isla should know.

'She's not Tara' Jax reminded himself

"Jacob Hale and city council have requested a new bail hearing on the federal weapons charge, I've already spoken to the others we're all going to follow up on this new information and hopefully be home in time for the hearing." Isla made a funny noise in the back of her throat "don't worry Isles it'll all work out" against her better judgement Isla just nodded and lay her head down on his chest again. Losing Abel and now the idea of losing Jax made Isla want to kick and scream until she got her own way and could keep everyone she loved wrapped up in bubble wrap safely at her side but things with the club didn't work that way so accepting that all she could do was to sit back and observe quietly Isla drifted off into yet another uneasy sleep, wrapped up in the arms of a man she now knew loved her.

 _SOASOASOASOA_

Although it was late and all the mechanics had either gone home or were drinking outside the club house Isla found herself sat in the office of Teller-Morrow still filing paperwork. It was tedious and a little bit mind numbing but kept her busy and stopped her from thinking about all the worst case scenarios that were running through her head.

After getting off the phone with Jax she had her daily update; they'd made it safely up to his grandfathers house and with some help from Tara, Gemma would be taking her father to the care home he was to be going into that afternoon. Isla sat at the desk lost in thought for a moment. She remembered when she was little, her own grandmother Lana had suffered with Vascular dementia and it had broken Emily's heart when she could no longer take care of her mother. Isla didn't remember much of what her Nanna was like before she had gotten ill but she had a few memories, the way they would all have dinner together every Sunday; with the best desserts and then how together the three generations would sit on the sofa and watch movies together or rather, Isla and Emily would whilst Lana fell asleep. But then she also remembered how her grandmother deteriorated; how over time she would confuse Isla for her mother until she no longer recognised her at all and it did make Isla's heart break for Gemma, she knew how hard it was going through it with her own Nanna but she couldn't imagine having to go through that sort of thing with a parent.

Out in the parking lot Gemma Teller looked around wildly; she had travelled miles from the care home where her father had been admitted. Travelled to see her grandson before she turned herself in to the cops as part of the deal she had made with Agent Stahl on the phone earlier that day, but when she had arrived back at Jax' house, it was empty. There was no sign of Isla, or Neeta or Abel! So she had sped down to Teller Morrow thinking Isla had to be there, where else could she be?!

Just as she was marching toward the office the burner in her back pocket began to ring, pulling it out she looked down at it thinking it had to be Jax

"yeah?"

"Gemma" a strong accent asked from the other end of the line "it's Maureen Ashby. You know who I am?"

Gemma started to feel flustered she didn't have time for this, not now after all these years.

"Yeah. How'd you get this number?" The Irish woman ignored her question

"Just listen; Cammy Hayes took your grandson." Gemma's heart started to beat faster and faster, she barely heard what was being said on the phone "he was my cousin, he brought him to me, wanted me to take care of him."

"What?" The Teller woman honestly thought for a moment her heart was going to burst out of her chest she couldn't comprehend what was happening

"Abel's in Belfast." Then the line went dead.

Gemma spun round as the roar of motorcycles could be heard coming into the lot and just as Isla opened the office door to come out and greet the others not knowing that Gemma had been there the whole time.

Her grandson had been kidnapped. And no one had told her. And he was in a different country.

It suddenly all became too much for her and Gemma collapsed on the cold hard floor.

"GEMMA!"

"MOM!"

Figures came rushing towards her from all directions as the darkness took its hold and she drifted off into unconsciousness.

 ** _A/N: as promised another chapter for you all my lovelies! I wrote this one as more shorter pieces as it seemed the best way for me to get it all down without trying to span everything out over multiple chapters. We've all seen the TV show! Plus I'm desperate to get onto my next chapter when Jax and Isla go to Belfast!_**

 ** _That last section was very close to my heart; Dementia is such a terrible disease and my thoughts are always with those who have experienced first hand how awful it can be._**

 ** _I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, will try to get another one out ASAP._**


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